Read on Twitter
this stripper on tiktok was talking abt how a lot of the men who buy private dances from her are like always asking if she's doing it bc she has to pay for college/has no other options and when she says she likes stripping they get upset...
comment section was full of girls w the same exact experience and like it's so OBVIOUS that the appeal of sexual services to men is the idea that the woman is unwilling
it's the same w PUAs right they want to feel like they've "fooled" a girl into sleeping w them bc it makes them feel powerful.. also like the way OF grls are getting doxxed/threatened vs the way men circulate creepshots/stolen nudes
like talking ab the madonna/whore complex feels trite but it's so real????
and this is also what i mean when i talk abt men's fear of being desired. the idea of women actually wanting them is so terrifying and abhorrent to them bc in their minds, it threatens their sexual power & subject position.
they are incapable of understanding mutual desire, for them it's always a subject/object position, and if they are desired they automatically lose their imagined power, becoming object (and victim!)
just look at how viscerally upset they are by any sexually provocative representation of a man... for one thing they always say it's gay, (because they literally can't imagine a woman looking at a man like this) and that it's somehow demeaning/violent to them & their self image
AND THIS is because, as i said, sexuality and desire is /inherently/ violent to them: you are either violator or victim. eroticism and sensuality play no part. which is why i think straight men are, at their core, frigid and consumed by sexual terror
