i can’t actually settle myself yet because i just remembered some wild shit that happened earlier this year.

i told y’all i have a weird... clairvoyant thing going on, right?

so i was cuddling with this guy and i mindlessly placed my hand under his ribcage on his abdomen. i immediately felt this extreme heaviness and sadness out of nowhere.

normally, i’d just move my hand, but i physically could not for some reason.

i was frozen.

what happened next was fuckin bizarre. i started seeing his past. things that were making him deeply sad. things he hadn’t shared with me yet.

i had a full on vision of all of his trauma.

i’d always seen him as a source of happiness, but i knew he was holding onto some shit.

it feels like it lasts 15 minutes. i still don’t know how long i was stuck, hand on his torso, watching his chest rise and fall while watching his fuckin life back.

it felt invasive as fuck. i still feel kinda guilty.

but eventually i’m able to let go.

the next day, i couldn’t be around him knowing i had seen such intimate parts of his story. so i brought up that i think he had some things he wasn’t addressing...

then i came clean about the weird experience i’d had while holding him.

and he confirmed everything i’d seen.

i’m sure it was weird. sorry to homie, still.

but a couple days later, i had an energy healing session and my spiritual guide was telling me about all the chakras.

she pointed under my rib cage and said, “the solar plexus chakra is where we hold all of our pain...”

“that’s why it feels like a punch in the gut when we feel hurt. that chakra guides personal power, so we place our stresses there.”

nigga... i damn near passed out.

i had no true understanding of chakral functions at that point. but i realized that whatever the fuck had happened was, as i suspected, spiritual.

and weird.

so i told her about it. cuz like wtf.

i saw and felt SO MUCH pain radiating off ole boy.

so what i’ve gathered is that i have a weird... power(?) to literally see and experience people’s chakral energy upon physical contact.

again, feels really invasive.

idk how to control it. and i don’t think it’s everyone. just people i’m very connected to.

so uh... that’s that. and hopefully now that i’ve unloaded this off my chest i can fall asleep.

but like... fuck. shit is wild.