Hey it’s after dark so real fast: what I usually see people talk about w/ endometriosis and hysterectomies is the cramping and period pain. What I see less often is talk of awful pain during sex. It’s called dyspareunia, and there are different kinds.

More shallow pain (vaginal opening or localized more externally) is usually vaginismus, inflammation/irritation/infection, trauma, or just plain not enough lube.

Deep pain (internal, intense) is usually attributed to things like endo or pelvic inflammatory disorder.

Both can be treated/managed. Medications exist, different factors of pain can be addressed, etc.

Here’s what I learned tonight: hysterectomies usually shorten the vaginal canal, and dyspareunia is a pretty common side effect of that.

Lots of people use aides like dilators or other tools to help reduce pain/regain comfort in the vaginal canal post-hysterectomy (4-8 weeks after surgery, like RESPONSIBLE ADULTS)

(And this is assuming someone is interested in penetration at all.)

I’m honestly pissed I didn’t learn about this sooner. It doesn’t change my mind or affect my decision at all. I’m already in so much internal pain that shifting that outward is literally a nonissue to me.

But I sure as fuck would have liked to’ve known???

I feel like, in the US, people aren’t frank enough with their physicians about how/if sex is important in their lives. I straight up told my endo doc that sex was literally Always Painful, like an 8 pain scale post-penetration unless I preempted it with NSAIDS.

(You know what’s super hot? Getting down and dirty with your partner and going “hey hold on I have to slam down 800mg of Ibuprofen before we do anything else or we’re gonna have a bad time”.)

(Some folks do that because of other disabilities, and I see you. It’s hot when y’all do it and I love you all.)

The point of all of this is: pain during sex can be managed, and you should talk about it with doctors you trust. If they don’t take it seriously, find a different damn doctor.

End thread.