Because I'd never given them much thought before today I got a little curious about Smash Mouth's origins. Like what kind of local music scene could exist where they were the cream of the crop and therefore could rise to national prominence? San Jose, CA. That answered nothing.

San Jose is a very affluent part of Silicon Valley. Smash Mouth or Smashmouth as they were then known somehow got their demo played on KOME, a local station known for its "raunchy, irreverent fun," ie, edgy racist white people humor. Carson Daly came out of that scene too.

Members of Smash Mouth as they became known after they signed with Interscope had formerly been in punk, ska and rap bands. As Smashmouth they were known for their covers of extremely obvious songs. There's nothing really instructive in any of this.

It's just a mediocre story of really mediocre people making mediocre noise but due to a geographic freak they got signed on a label. Oh well.

If it proves anything it's that America loves its mediocre white people if they start in a place where there's already money floating around.

Smash Mouth is the whitest of white. Like if you took a plain white t-shirt and bleached it for a month you would only achieve a fraction of how white Smash Mouth is.

One of the many things I've failed at where Smash Mouth succeeded is having a music career. We utterly failed in a place that actually is known for its music scene. I mean talk about some prissy elitism there. Like we wouldn't be known as the place that spawned Smash Mouth.

Real bands came from where we failed. Sadly, we were actually if anything much worse even than Smash Mouth. The only thing we got right about being in a rock band was the heavy drug use part. Out of the 7 or so people who drifted in and out of our line up 3 are dead now.

I would say we were really highly skilled at the Behind the Music stuff but none of the In Front of the Music Stuff. No one debauched themselves before during and after a show like we did unless it's Keith Richards. But like I said it killed 3 people.

At least they were all members of the actual band and not our audience. I wonder what Smash Mouth's body count will be from this weekend.

This is the end of my Smash Mouth investigation.