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dear fandom: feminine men ARE NOT WOMEN.
STOP WRITING US LIKE WE ARE.
STOP WRITING US LIKE WE ARE.
cis women do not have a monopoly on femininity!!! men (and men-shaped humans like me) are feminine in our own wholly unique, manly way. we already get truckloads of shit from the gay community, can you please stop providing them with shovels?
if you don& #39;t know how to write a character& #39;s identity, here are your options:
1. don& #39;t
2. listen to and learn from people with that identity so you can do them justice
3. engage the services of people with that identity to point your bullshit out (with some form of payment)
1. don& #39;t
2. listen to and learn from people with that identity so you can do them justice
3. engage the services of people with that identity to point your bullshit out (with some form of payment)
i would literally prefer there be less fanfic than have to keep reading fic where the femme man is described with words used for female characters. i would prefer ao3 have an 8th of its current library. i would prefer no fics at all than this hell.
i am a feminine enby man (mostly) and i have fought tooth and nail for my male femininity. i have fought femmephobia from my mum, my exhusband, other trans masc people, other enbies, other women!!!!! i will not let my fandom take it too.
https://twitter.com/elvashayam/status/1292083981559533570?s=19">https://twitter.com/elvashaya...
OH. and isn& #39;t it VERY INTERESTING how there is fucking mountains of fic for mlm couples, but wlw (even canon ones!!!!!) get no love? ISN& #39;T THAT INTERESTING
this despite apparently most of fandom being queer women!!! (that& #39;s what& #39;s bandied about when people critique fandom, so obviously yall think it means something.)
HOW INTERESTING.
HOW INTERESTING.
you can be bi and prefer men. yes. i am bi and prefer men (before and after transition). but being bi doesn& #39;t cancel out learned beliefs - you gotta do that work yourself. society is femmephobic and thus EVERYONE (myself included!!!) is femmephobic!
don& #39;t care what your gender or sexuality is. you& #39;re femmephobic.
and it& #39;s your responsibility to deal with it.
and it& #39;s your responsibility to deal with it.
cisheteronormative roles in mlm looks like (an incomplete list):
- strict top (dom)/bottom (sub) dynamics
- feminisation as humiliation
- the bottom is emotionally literate, the top refuses to be
- top gets injured, bottom cares for them
- bottom is "annoying", top is harsh/cruel
- strict top (dom)/bottom (sub) dynamics
- feminisation as humiliation
- the bottom is emotionally literate, the top refuses to be
- top gets injured, bottom cares for them
- bottom is "annoying", top is harsh/cruel
- bottom: "soft", weak, forgives insults etc without a change in behaviour, is a caretaker/homemaker/other historically female vocation
- top: stereotypically buff and butch, gruff, "affectionate" insults verging on cruel, is a provider/adventurer/other historically male vocation
- top: stereotypically buff and butch, gruff, "affectionate" insults verging on cruel, is a provider/adventurer/other historically male vocation
- bottom uses pet names, top uses insults
- bottom has to teach top how to be clean/tidy/accept help
- (a recent one) bottom is described as feral, but only when protecting top; self-defence is rare/surprising
- bottom is abducted/tortured to get top& #39;s attention
- bottom has to teach top how to be clean/tidy/accept help
- (a recent one) bottom is described as feral, but only when protecting top; self-defence is rare/surprising
- bottom is abducted/tortured to get top& #39;s attention
