In honor of my city recently being called a beehive of terrorists. I decided to look into this further.

What better way to do this than by live tweeting some observations while watching Bee Movie for the first time.

Initially I was just going to write an article but since it’s the middle of the day, think of this as daytime television. But instead of selling you a set of knives or watching jeopardy or family feud we’re gonna hang out with a movie that scored 50 percent on the tomato meter

So the movie starts out pretty violently. During the opening studio screen announcing it’s a DreamWorks picture. A person floats up to the crescent moon via a bunch of balloons but a bee bothers the person by buzzing around and possibly stinging them before popping the balloons.

The person screams as they plummet toward the earth and instead of the shadow person standing on the moon slice it’s a bee. Also it’s a cartoon so it’s funny not horrifying unless this is horrifying for someone. In which case my apologies for being calloused.

Jerry Seinfeld wakes up (as a bee) and examines a wardrobe filled with the same clothes... “...yellow black yellow black yellow black... Ah! Black and yellow!” This reminds me of Ernest P Worrel.

Seinfeld puts some fuzz gel in his hair and sharpens his stinger in an electric pencil sharpener-like device and then flies downstairs. His mother chastises him for not using the stairs his father spent a lot of money on.

(Backtracking the bee antennas work like phone headsets apparently) Seinfeld’s parents are proud that he is graduating and got all Bees in school. Seinfeld flies out of the house mom says to stop flying in the house.

For some reason the bees drive cars. Regardless we learn that Time moves quickly for bees and college takes three days. Seinfeld picks up a friend and they go to their graduation.

This movie will likely be cheesy: Seinfeld makes a joke that there is a lot of pomp under the circumstances.

Basically the ceremony is like congrats class of 921 you graduated which seems like a wildly low number (maybe it’s 921.3 so then it’s actually like 9,000 some odd.

I guess maybe that’s for this particular colony which 900 days or if it’s in groups of three days would be 2700 days which I could see being vaguely substantial for a group of bees to continue to have a rooted colony.

On the drive over Jerry’s friend asks if they’ll get to pick their jobs today. I was thinking about how a chant I regularly hear at protests in general is that Portland is a union town. Bees are workers unions represent workers etc. maybe that’s what trump is talking about?

So after the ceremony ends their caps are traded for hard hats and their seats are converted into what looks like the cars of an amusement park ride.

It’s established by their car’s tour guide that they are going to work for a corporation called “Honex, a division of Honesco!”

“We know you’ve worked your whole life to get to the place where you can work your whole life.”

Seinfeld seems alone in experiencing massive dread over the thought of working the same job for the rest of his life. The others seem enthusiastic about this permanent arrangement.

The guide says something about bees not taking a day off in 27 million years and Jerry asks: “So you’ll just work us to death?” The guide replies: “We’ll sure try!” In a way too pleasant voice.

Also to back track: Jerry’s family lives in a huge house in the suburbs. The college and workplace are in a large city with big highways. There is a big amusement park-esque drop in the road that reminds one of a rollercoaster.

Seinfeld remarks that with fun like this you don’t have to take a day off. Seinfeld feels cool with his gelled hair. This occurred before graduation and dread.