The Boyz as Greek gods reincarnated in modern times: a thread

Zeus — Being king of the gods is pretty easy these days, given that no one's starting wars over golden apples anymore. It's pretty much an admin job now, and Sangyeon spends all his free time using little lightning bolts to create sick new synth beats in his studio.

Demeter — Eons ago, when his job as the god of harvest was just growing oats for cereal, Jacob's life was pretty chill. Now, however, he's frantically developing sustainable farming methods because he didn't grow all this stuff just for climate change to ruin it, gosh darn it!

Aphrodite — Being the most beautiful person in the world gets old after a while, but now that they have moving pictures called movies, Younghoon finds life terribly exciting. It's pretty fun seeing how many people he can make fall in love with him over the silver screen.

Dionysus — Sure, being a club owner seems like a pretty weird job for a god, but Hyunjae lives for the cheers when he makes wine pour from thin air. Besides, it's way easier to wreak mischief when everyone's wasted on expensive vodka. Only the best for friends of the god of wine!

Hades — Juyeon had gotten used to only having his Cerberus & books for company because of the whole hell and all-black-clothes thing. Now, after MySpace, it seems his style is totally in; he thinks it's called 'goth', but he isn't 100% sure. Still, he's loving human interaction!

Artemis — Being god of the moon is way more exciting nowadays with the internet & insomniacs abound. Kevin runs a very popular 2AM stream show called Moonlight Scribbles where he draws & makes ASMR. Plus, "gay" sounds better than "virgin god who doesn't have het relationships".

Athena — Chanhee wasn't sure about this whole world wide web thing when it first came about, but then he discovered Wikipedia. Now, the god of wisdom spends all day editing poorly written Wikipedia articles and leaving scathing comments on misinformed Reddit threads. Idiots.

Hecate — The god of witchcraft & ghosts is surprisingly busy in an era of non-believers. Changmin writes a wildly popular YA black-magic-thriller series, but he's busiest on Halloween when he goes out & summons ghosts for a month straight just to scare unsuspecting strangers.

Poseidon — After watching the Netflix docu Salt Fat Acid Heat, god of the sea, Haknyeon, became obsessed with distilling salt out of the ocean. From where he lives on Jeju island, he blogs about how flaky salt crunches as garnish & how smoked salt tastes atop roasted vegetables.

Apollo — Idol-hood comes pretty easily as the god of music & archery. Sometimes, after a huge win, Hyunjoon wonders if he should feel bad, but hey, it's every man/deity for himself. Anyway, it's pretty funny when ISAC rolls around & he smokes the mortals in the archery contest.

Ares — Since antiquity, Sunwoo has mellowed out as the god of war. Of course, taking up meditation at the local yoga studio helps - he's all about inner peace now. It's not his fault that his mere presence stirs up chaos among the other yoga patrons as they vie for his attention.

Hermes — It's mostly fun being the baby messenger god, except for his Olympian-hyungs forcing him to finish uni. They also limit how much pocket money Eric gets, but they don't know he's secretly working for GrubHub. It's okay though, winged sandals make deliveries super speedy.

Inspired by this beautiful thread!: https://twitter.com/cutedeobies/status/1285187296011026432