You may not meet with anyone else in a house even for childcare. Unless that childcare provider is registered cos registration gives you some sort of Covid immune superpower?

Also, you cannot meet a partner you don't live with in your home. But you may go to a hotel with them.

Also, residents of Greater Manchester, parts of East Lancashire and West Yorkshire... you may not meet family or friends in a garden. But please do feel free to go down the pub and hang out in the vicinity of strangers.

Strangers are Covid immune?

Please DO NOT leave your children with family members for childcare. Family members are NOT Covid secure.

Nurseries though, where your children mix with children from other non Covid secure families... well they are Covid secure.

You definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely cannot have your Mum in your garden for a barbecue.

No. Bad bad bad, Greater Manchester. You can't do that.

But feel free to jump on the bus into the city and go to work, ok?

FFS Manchester. How many times do we need to tell you that it's NOT SAFE to be in someone's back garden? Not safe. Bad. Naughty.

Now get your coat on and head to that restaurant. It's half price today.

And finally, in case we have not already been clear enough, you cannot visit your Nan. If you and your Nan both happen to be at Alton Towers on the same day though, you can have a natter in the queue for Oblivion, ok?