Ok girlies enbies and others! I'm finally making my thread on how to dom.

For clarification: To dom/dominate is the psychological aspect of being in a position of power over your partner/partners

To be a sub/submissive is to release some aspect of control to another partner/partners

And to be a switch is to be both

This is different from topping or bottoming which refer to physical/sexual acts. So a dom can bottom and a sub could top. This is due to top/bottoming being a reference to the sexual acts taking place in the moment.

So here are some simple things to keep in mind while being dominant:

1. It is all about confidence. You must have complete confidence in yourself and what you are doing. This does not mean one should be arrogant or abusive. This also does not mean that you can't slow down+

ask questions or be unsure. It just means to be confident in yourself as a sexual agent. There is no need to be ashamed for engaging in sexual acts and wanting to please/be pleased by your partner/s. Be confident in the fact that you are having a (hopefully) healthy loving and +

empowering sexual experience.

2. Have fun. Don't be too confident and arrogant to the point where it's dry or threatening. Make sure you show excitement in what is going on. (Unless otherwise discussed between partner/s) Remember ego is left at the door here. It is about you AND your partner/s+

Not just about you and your desire for control. (People often forget that domming is more nuanced than just exerting control. It involves the energy BETWEEN the people at play. It is never about one sole person.

3. Check in with your partner/s. How are they responding to you? Are they pleased? Feel free to ask questions. People think that doms are supposed to know everything but that is not the case. You can not read your partner/s mind/s. You can still be dominant and ask your partner+

for clarification on what they would like from you. Tease them and make them speak up for what they want. This in itself is still creating a dynamic in which you are domming.

4. Communication. This is vital for anything to work. Before and after any sexual activities conversations on boundaries or safe words should be held. After care is critical!

5. Play into your partner/s desires. Although you are in "control," allow your partner/s to steer the ship at times only for you take that power back. Feel free to play w differing power dynamics. You do not need to be in control 100% of the time. That can actually get boring+

pretty quickly if you are unwilling to work with your partner.

Just remember that people are always learning and adapting. And so are your partner/s. Feel free to experiment. Never be afraid to ask questions or clarification. It is better to ask before doing to ensure boundaries are not crossed. But most importantly+

have fun and enjoy yourselves! Hopefully this thread helped. If not then it eez what it eez.