so, inspiration hit me like a train over this lil idea, so let's just call this what it's gonna become: a thread fic. bc lbh if i ever attempt to write this properly my perfectionism will turn it into a monster fic I'll never publish

buckle up for a #sangcheng "fairy tale" au:

for context, this is the idea/story behind my comic I posted a few days ago: https://twitter.com/pyjamacryptid/status/1288329168606728193?s=20

this is essentially going to be what i like to call a 'semi-organised ramble', and it's pretty self-indulgent like all good things, so - just have fun, kids. also pls keep in mind I’m combining mdzs canon w/ some western fairy tale tropes lol

oh also, one more thing. throughout this thread fic you must do one thing, it's very important.

imagine me like this:

it's barely a few months after the events at guanyin temple when nhs is elected chief cultivator by unanimous vote, his idk routine unacknowledged. it’s barely 3 months in and he's DONE. held on longer than he’d thought but he’s done now, how to rage quit, he needs a helpline

he doesn't want to be chief cultivator thank u, he has his own sect to look after & he's hardly managing that despite his efforts to delegate everything he can & cont'ing to insist he doesn't know a thing - which he DOeSn’T. he is tired & has set aside 15 mins each day for crying

nhs, bemoaning having to wake up at 4am for an 8am sect leader meeting, stomping out to the carriage: it would be quite the SHAME if someone, ANYONE, were to DEPOSE me. or perhaps DO AWAY WITH me, would be a rEAL SHAME—

an opportunity comes when an assassin attempts to murder him with a curse in his sleep. (be careful what you wish for lmao). unfortunately for the assassin, nhs is an insomniac and is awake. unfortunately for nhs, he still gets hit by the curse

the assassin barely escapes with a slash across their back made by one of nhs' special fans, and nhs barely survives bc by pure coincidence, wangxian had been passing through qinghe nie on one of their many travels and had been alerted by the noise

they'd been staying in a nearby guest room (rip) so wwx arrives just in time to stop the curse from finishing the job. 2 nie disciples that were on duty were long gone, chasing after the would-be assassin. lwj joins them. a 3rd & 4th nie disciple get the dr and sound the alarm

wwx had stopped the curse in a pinch, so nhs may be alive but has fallen into a deep sleep. the next day is tense for qinghe nie as wwx & the sect’s head doctor work on attempting to reverse/stabilise the curse

lwj & the nie disciples return - they had somehow lost the would-be assassin. they dk how bc the jerk was injured but the trail had run cold and they’re willing to bet they’d had help & weren’t working alone

it’s then wwx manages something. nhs' deep sleep is no longer permanent, BUT he doesn't know how long it'll last either. he's clear w/ everyone: this is not a long-term solution. the curse is very strong & very complex,

he tells them that he cannot break it/reverse it, nor change it beyond what he’s already managed. he tells them that the assassin must be found, along with whomever ordered the hit, or nie huaisang may not outlive a year’s time

so, qinghe nie announce to the cultivation world that nhs survived a fatal curse but as a result is currently in a deep, indefinite sleep. wwx adds on that the only way to get rid of the curse is ofc if the one(s) who inflicted the curse either remove it or die,

wwx: that! oooor nhs is,, kissed. by someone who loves him truly


nie vice-general: what, like a true love’s kiss?


wwx: ;D



nie sect:

the sect nearly kick wwx out for his ~embellishment~ (bs), but they kinda need him to check for any tangible clues left in the curse as to whom the assassin/their employer might be. wwx gets a lead and leaves with lwj & some nie disciples to go on a proper manhunt

it’s three days later that, to everyone's surprise, nhs wakes up early. he's exhausted but alive, and when he hears what the cultivation world's been told he's ECSTATIC

nhs is like I have no reputation to save, was already planning on claiming illness at some point, but fatal curse dormant in my body that might kill me within the year??? that’s a definite “do not disturb” sign, right there! thank u universe!!

nie sect:

look nhs saw an opportunity presented to him on a shining silver platter, you bet your ass he snatched that right up, much to the chagrin of his most trusted clan members. they all wanted him to catch a break yes but PERHAPS not one prescribed by, yknow, an ASSASSIN

(i assume he would have the innermost part of the nie clan & his most trusted clan members, in on this. it's not all choice, they're witnessing The Mess he is in real time, and unfortunately for nhs, they care about him.)

((let me give him loyal nie clan members!!))

besideeeees, he has nothing to sweat about!!! wangxian and his clan members will find the assassin & their employer in nooo timeeee, this is ~holiday leave babeyyyy~

so everyone, aside from the innermost nie clan members and wangxian, continue to believe that nhs is currently in a deep sleep, unable to be woken until the assassin is caught or, like the (un)surprising amount of people who believe wwx's bs, until nhs is given true love’s kiss

the head of nhs' household staff, an old but spry woman (im gonna say he calls her auntie lin) who's known nhs since he was a kid, tells him about wwx's embellishment that's mislead a lot of people and - once again to their chagrin - nhs LOVES IT