[GONNA THINK IF DELETE THIS OR NOT SOON]

So yeah, since I created my private side account, everything was a rollercoaster whose parabelleums are, the majority, going down and hardly rising up to me. The reason begun long time ago, when I met a great artist here-

-Her content was brilliant and she was so cute, not gonna lie. OK, leaving that aside, I decided to follow her & support in all as I could... basically, acting like a "simp". Everything was great, the time has passed and the first time a conflict started was when her boyfriend-

-called me a "simp". Yeah... I took it way too serious, messing up in just 2 days, screenshotting and showing it in public. She broke the silence with me & I proceeded to delete everything related on that topic, same as flirting the one who I had a crush.
And if I did it, her-

-friends came to tell me to stop it instead of she could tell directly to me.
Anyway, time flew, she created a Discord server, I joined & everything was to chill.
Everybody gangsta till I ruined it again w/saying something very out of position, I apologized for it and never-

-happened again.
Alright, at this point, I considered all my mistakes from the past to don't break a kind of follower and artist "friendship". I realized she started acting to ignore me, like if I did something so wrong I don't remember... I had forgotten about the previous ones-

-but I decided to see what's the matter and... it ended quite bad.
I did callout posts (I forgot it, seriously) without thinking of the consequences, while I was crying inside, until she blocked me.
It kinda puts me in a bad moment, for real, so I wanted to know her why...-

-She had called me a "stalker"... it has hit me strong, but I contained the tears because, in the deep, she'd be better now, thing that never happened as I previously expected.
Weeks later, I had entered into Twitter when I saw somebody DM'd me.
Strange it was, so I checked what-

-was. She sent to me that she wasn't feeling well in those times, her mind was tired of it, she felt bad... the point? She told me that, due her inconveniences, she put me the label of "stalker" & blocked me instead of talking w/me directly in private. She didn't do it because-

-she was afraid of breaking my heart, as in those times I loved her so much...
She told me she wanted to help to heal out, a cure to my mark. I literally cried a lot that day... she didn't want to be apologized cause it was something she learnt to her future, still I accepted it-

-as apologies.
Since she wrote to me that she's going to be glad I'll be OK was the comeback of my past and callout posts just by the coincidence the "Ice Law" was still there. Didn't learn, have a soft and fool heart!
It was the drop that spilled the glass...
She blew up, not-

-matter how broken I would end, and started of taking the initiative. I wanted to know what I did wrong now to being ignored, and she told me nothing except having a crush on her, which was unhealthy down her perspective and making her uncomfortable at some point.
I... it was-

-enough to me to put me in reason, so strong I felt that hit that still I'm recovering from it. So currently, I'm still leaving her in total peace... I just hope she's okay now without me, a total, foolish, cheesy & blind dumbass that ruined a life without thinking back-

-I regret of my bad actions, I don't regret of having a crush on her because I was conscientious it is impossible having opposite perpectives from each other.
Although it hurts me, I enjoy that psychological pain in short.
I don't want neither have the pardon of nobody, nobody-

-I said, this is what I deserve for breaking someone I love...

Before ending this thread, last 2 things:

1. I don't want, nobody related with her, shows this to the person directly. I'm saying this for her sake. In consequence if she reads it, hope you read the second one...

2. Listen, I know I have commited several mistakes on my past, even if I apologized for it, even if I've changed, I'm still the same crazy person to you who see me I never changed I guess... but every action I made just brought more mental problems to you. I feel quite bad at-

-this moment, but my words and screenshots are the only evidence I have to prove my change, thing that you'll think more than twice of me. At this point, I don't deserve nothing in change except being ignored by you.
I hurt you, I wanted to help you as you told to me too-

- & I totally appreciate you for getting worried of my sake, but here, in this thread, I'm expressing every thing I kept saved on me for a long time. My intention was never making you pass through bad moments all this time, just to helping you. I only hope you get better from-

-all my serious misunderstandings, heal that mark I left on you. Hope your future life shines, keeping strong against several obstacles and not giving up. Stay safe & have a nice day... see ya. Hope you get better from my stupidity... see ya.

- VB (August 4th, 2020 at 12:33 AM)