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One of my strangest regrets in life is knowing that my bio father, whom passed in an accident when I was 1yo, was Jewish and never really following up on that. My mother however isn& #39;t, and thus I didn& #39;t "qualify" but I still wore that little tidbit on my sleeve in highschool
When I was 16 or so, I went through a small crisis of identity.
I& #39;d always been very atheist up to that point, and while I still wasn& #39;t into the idea of an organized religion... i thought, should I have converted and carried his legacy forward, when my family was unaffiliated?
I& #39;d always been very atheist up to that point, and while I still wasn& #39;t into the idea of an organized religion... i thought, should I have converted and carried his legacy forward, when my family was unaffiliated?
Even today. It still weighs heavy on my mind.
Moreso now that I have two little girls who we regale the tales of Santa Clause and celebrate Easter despite my wife and I having carried exactly zero religious affiliation, but just going through so my kids didn& #39;t feel left out
Moreso now that I have two little girls who we regale the tales of Santa Clause and celebrate Easter despite my wife and I having carried exactly zero religious affiliation, but just going through so my kids didn& #39;t feel left out
But each Christmas that passes by, id ask my wife what she& #39;d think if I started conversion to Judaism proper and how she& #39;d handle doing Jewish traditions (she& #39;s of Chinese descent for those interested)
She always tells me she& #39;d support it in every way.
And yet
She always tells me she& #39;d support it in every way.
And yet
Tbh I don& #39;t know the first thing about any of it, aside from the most obvious and well known of concepts of course. I don& #39;t even know how "Jewish" he actually was (Faith? Faith and Race? Race only? Loved it? Disliked it?) My mother doesn& #39;t know or remember ANY part of that
And yes I have reached out to that side of the family. And yes I did wind up meeting my biological uncle, his brother, and he wept at the sight of me, for I was a "spitting image" of him.
But then I stopped receiving responses, and communication went totally silent
But then I stopped receiving responses, and communication went totally silent
I think my grandmother passed was the problem, she was the one we were able to reach, and she was the one that I was sending letters too. When we couldn& #39;t reach her anymore, no one bothered to keep us in the loop and ive never heard from anyone on that side ever again
I sometimes think ill try to reach out again, if not for nothing but to get some answers to some of my questions regarding my bio dad that I& #39;ve had since the last communication.
And, sadly, things like online family tree makers with obituaries haven& #39;t been much help
And, sadly, things like online family tree makers with obituaries haven& #39;t been much help
I sometimes feel I hallucinated the whole set of encounters. It feels like I drummed up these memories of meeting my uncle and sending holiday cards and school photos to my grandmother.
The whole situation feels really strange to even recall.
But my mother confirms we did this
The whole situation feels really strange to even recall.
But my mother confirms we did this
Theres this whole part of me that is constantly at odds in my mind
Sometimes I just feel like converting, JUST TO SEE if that would slake the thirst of this series of thoughts that have plagued my mind ever since I was a child
But I feel that& #39;d be disingenuous and disrespectful
Sometimes I just feel like converting, JUST TO SEE if that would slake the thirst of this series of thoughts that have plagued my mind ever since I was a child
But I feel that& #39;d be disingenuous and disrespectful
I have no conclusion to this thread. Sorry.
Seeing a lot of Jewish history these past couple days, and it just got my mind going again.
Seeing a lot of Jewish history these past couple days, and it just got my mind going again.
