Just tried to take a selfie to see if I got some sun today. When the hell did I get old? And when did one eye become squinty. I want my money back.

I guess I kind of like having one squinty eye. I may even be able to put it to use if I ever go back into government. People can say to wayward financial disclosure filers: "arr, don& #39;t ye be missin& #39; the deadline or ol& #39; pirate eye& #39;ll be comin& #39; for ya"

I also just realized from the pic that my hair is really really short because that& #39;s how short the hair cutter had to go to hide the mess I made when I Delilah& #39;d my head at the beginning of June. Oh accursed year. I shake my fist at you, 2020.