Read on Twitter
Hey y& #39;all! I& #39;d like to take a moment to talk about the new romantic relationships folks are forming during the pandemic. I see lots of folks talking about these amazing new relationships they& #39;re in that started during/just before the pandemic and that are getting serious.
Here& #39;s the thing - almost any connection you& #39;ve been making or deepening during the last 4.5 months is almost certainly deeply affected by trauma bonding. Trauma bonding refers to the way that we often feel deeply close to those with whom we have experienced traumatic things.
The bond feels very deep very quickly because it& #39;s largely driven by the huge disturbance that created it. This means it& #39;s often not a *healthy* connection. Trauma bonding makes it easy to ignore the things that create problems in the longer term.
When our relationship is centered around surviving this thing together, we don& #39;t necessarily set our boundaries or ask for what we want and need. After all, we& #39;re all overwhelmed, why make a fuss! Or we tell ourselves, but they stayed with me through such a hard time!
When we& #39;re in the middle of a global pandemic, which for those of us in the US is being handled VERY poorly, and a massive social uprising, as well as threats to our democracy and a *serious* economic crash, our brains aren& #39;t working at their best. We& #39;re not thinking clearly
That& #39;s normal! It& #39;s to be expected! And it means that the parts of our brain that handle future planning and impulse control and analysis aren& #39;t working. These are the parts that help us determine if a relationship is working in a long term way.
