Saw this, loved it, sharing it as a thread.
A policeman pulled a young lady over for speeding.
"Young lady, you were speeding! Can I see your driving licence, please?"
"Ooh, & #39;fraid not. I don& #39;t have one. The last time I was in court for drunk driving they took it away."
/1
A policeman pulled a young lady over for speeding.
"Young lady, you were speeding! Can I see your driving licence, please?"
"Ooh, & #39;fraid not. I don& #39;t have one. The last time I was in court for drunk driving they took it away."
/1
"The last time?"
"Yes. Four times I& #39;ve been had up for drunk driving."
"OK. Let me see your vehicle registration documents."
"& #39;Fraid not. I stole this car."
"What? You stole the car?"
"Yes. And to steal it I had to kill the owner."
/2
"Yes. Four times I& #39;ve been had up for drunk driving."
"OK. Let me see your vehicle registration documents."
"& #39;Fraid not. I stole this car."
"What? You stole the car?"
"Yes. And to steal it I had to kill the owner."
/2
"You killed the owner just to steal a car?"
"& #39;Fraid so. Not only that, but I couldn& #39;t get his body into the boot so I hacked him into pieces, put them in bin bags, and put the bin bags in the boot."
The policeman looked aghast and backed off. "You& #39;re a bloody psychopath!"
/3
"& #39;Fraid so. Not only that, but I couldn& #39;t get his body into the boot so I hacked him into pieces, put them in bin bags, and put the bin bags in the boot."
The policeman looked aghast and backed off. "You& #39;re a bloody psychopath!"
/3
"That& #39;s what my last victim said," smiled the young lady. "You know, I think you& #39;re going to need a senior officer here to deal with me."
"Too right!" said the policeman, who radioed his station.
Soon an Inspector arrived and was briefed by the policeman.
/4
"Too right!" said the policeman, who radioed his station.
Soon an Inspector arrived and was briefed by the policeman.
/4
"Now" he began, approaching the young lady, "you lost your driving licence because you were done for drunk driving..."
"Eh?" said the young lady. "I& #39;ve never been done for drunk driving."
She dug in her handbag and drew out her driving licence, giving it to the Inspector.
/5
"Eh?" said the young lady. "I& #39;ve never been done for drunk driving."
She dug in her handbag and drew out her driving licence, giving it to the Inspector.
/5
"OK," said the Inspector. "And you stole this car..."
"No I never," said the young lady, ferreting in her handbag. "Here are my registration papers."
The Inspector looked perplexed.
/6
"No I never," said the young lady, ferreting in her handbag. "Here are my registration papers."
The Inspector looked perplexed.
/6
"The story I& #39;ve got from that policeman is that you have no driving licence, no vehicle registration, and that you murdered a man to steal this car, hacked up his body and put the bits in bin bag, which you then placed in the boot."
/7
/7
The young lady led the Inspector to the back of the car and flipped open the boot, which was quite empty.
"You idiot!" the Inspector bellowed at the sheepish-looking policeman. "Everything you& #39;ve told me is a load of rubbish!"
/8
"You idiot!" the Inspector bellowed at the sheepish-looking policeman. "Everything you& #39;ve told me is a load of rubbish!"
/8
The young lady leaned towards the Inspector and whispered in his ear.
"I bet you the lying bugger told you I was speeding, too!"
/9
"I bet you the lying bugger told you I was speeding, too!"
/9