TW.

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TW. Suicide

I'm officially 6 months on T today and I've never been happier. Maybe it's coincidence but my whole life seemed to fall into place after I started and I can never remember a time where I've been this consistently content with myself or my situation. 1/?

TW

TW Suicide

This is especially poignant when you consider where I was in the months leading up to me starting T. In the first semester of college this year I attempted suicide, not for the first time but hopefully the last. I was incredibly lucky. 2/?

TW -

I woke up the next morning in quite the state. I went into work as normal, albeit a lot of pain, and didn't speak about it to anyone for 2 months, still suffering the after effects. I was afraid if I told my doctors they would decide it was unwise for me to start HRT 3/?

This is ONE time that a trans person has hidden their mental health (and physical) from the people supposed to be helping them, because they are genuinely afraid that they will no longer be medically treated or supported with their transition. 4/?

It upsets me, but doesn't shock me, that the current discourse around trans issues isn't 'how can we make a marginalised community feel safer' but is 'how can we justify our marginalisation of a community'. 5/?

The mental health issues that I live with are demonised in every corner of society. Issues that make people think you are crazy or dangerous. If you know me you probably know that the only person I have ever been dangerous towards is myself. 6/?

The majority of people in my postion are the same. This bias feeds into how doctors treat me though, it prevents them from seeing what will actually help me. I am stuck in a cycle of not being able to tell doctors what is happening to me because if I do the treatment I need - 7/?

The treatment I need will be taken away from me. The treatment, testosterone, that has dramatically improved my quality of life in every aspect. 8/?

Cis people see hrt as a way to change someone's secondary sex characteristics, and yes it does do that and yes that's amazing. The emotional impact for me has been much stronger though, I feel so good. Not just because a small part of my gender dysphoria has dissipated 9/?

But because I feel right for the first time.

People find every excuse to not medically treat trans people who need to be treated, they find every excuse to not let those who are questioning talk...

10/?

And then they label our community as dramatic and hysterical and over the top when we try and speak out agaisnt this treatment.

If you hear a trans person speaking from a place of pain, please listen. Don't dismiss what they say as exaggeration. 11/?

Hormone Replacement Therapy has saved my life. What an easy way to drastically improve someone's existence, and yet people have to fight tooth and nail, lie and act to access it.

We also have to answer invaisive and dysphoria inducing questions to even be considered

12/?

So, if you see a video of a woman being misgendered and laugh at her reaction, or wonder why your friend talks (or tweets!) about their experience a lot - just know that something like T, that makes life so much better is actively made more difficult to access every day.

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