Rant;a thread

So,today im gonna sit and rant about my life. I don't care if im being selfish, ungrateful, disrespectful or a brat. I have my say in everything and im a person who has feelings.
most of this is gonna focus on skin colour

so im brown, or basically from Bangladesh (). and in Bangladesh,fair skin is favoured and labeled as desirable. this causes many skin whitening creams which I am against. darker skin,like mine is considered ugly or in desirable.

my mom has fair skin,my dad doesn't.
I also don't have fair skin. the expectation of society caused poor self imagery for me from a pretty young age. I remember a couple of years ago,my mom fed me honey and tumeric mixed up saying that it would give me fairer skin.

I as a little kid thought nothing of it and ate it but then I grew tired of it thinking that,my skin colour is good enough. so I avoided it for half an hour with my mom chasing me with it. my dad told me to eat it and I kept saying no,later both of them became very angry

they insulted me a lot that night. but I didn't feel guilty at all.
my tutor is an army, she's like an older sister to me and we're very close.
she was tall,and didn't have light skin to which I never actually paid attention.
but my mom said she looked like a Nigerian

it broke my heart.
my grandmother referred to her as "oui kaala seri"(that dark skinned girl)
and this is very colorist considering she was very fair as well.
let's just hope my tutor doesn't know about this

next is,my friends

me and my two friends are very close.
both of them have fair skin.
and they used to say stuff about my skin to which I never actually paid any attention to.
but once one of them said I looked like a tanned camel and the other agreed

I got offended and I talked to my favorite English teacher. and she said that it shouldn't pay attention. one of my other friends talked to them and they said that I talked about their skin and about how light it was etc.

well I never did! I never talked about skin color. I told my mom and she didn't take me seriously.

and I felt like I had no one to turn to

they always talked about how easily offended I get,and first of all,
if you knew how I got offended why don't you try to avoid it?is it too hard?
is it too much to ask for?
am I actually too sensitive or are you just mean?

but they bought it up this year again,after we made up.

and this time I defended myself.
and I was furious and talked and insulted them out of anger
remember, insecurities aren't something to make fun of.
I ended up crying that day

and that's the end of this thread.
I couldn't keep it inside me for so long.
I bottle up anything I can and it hurts