Live Story Time? Yes? No? Well....imma tweet it anyways Part1: I met this guy at the gas station today, we made small talk. He asked me how I pump gas with no hands, I showed him (I’m mad fucking nice) then, he asked for my number. I was gon say no but, this guy who was so

Part 2: fucking fine and delicious and looked like his dick was made out of gold and can seriously hurt me(in a good way) injected himself in the conversation and was like “ma, give the guy your numba” but damn daddy I’m ready to drop my draws for you

Part 3: His wife jumps out the car and was like “baby, give it to him” she was GORGEOUS. All the fine guys are taken and I hate life

Part 4: Well, I give him my number. I drive away and he calls. Bruh, text me. I didn’t answer but, I’m bored now

Part 5: So I text him “whatcha doing” he instantly replies let’s go out tonight.

Part 6: Our date is at 10pm.....imma have him pay for my babysitter and get to-go bags for my kids a lil joke for my old old followers

Part 7: yeah, imma be a tad bit late cause, I really want to see this other guy once I’m done here

This guy sent me pic of him getting ready and he is not easy on the eyes. It’s charity at this point This should be a tax write off

Part 8: he’s late

Part 9: soooooooo let me start running up this tab let’s see how many I can down before, his GRAND FUCKING ENTRANCE (because that’s probably why he’s late) he wants music playing when he arrives. Dassit! He’s a diva! My mind is made up. I hate him. This isn’t gon work

I’m deadass about to leave

Part 11: I was so busy drinking I ain’t even realize, I waited FORTY TWO MINUTES. Listen, Brian with his buddies across from me, asked to buy me a drink. I politely said “no, Thank you” but he IS CUTE. Wait, until FUCK FACE comes

Part 12: ugly men! I have moneeeeeeyyyyyy.........

Okay. So, Dude was late but hes a very interesting man. He has a place by the water, he just bought. A penthouse in Miami. He already cashapp me money, so I can take Monday off

I just wrapped up my date. 1. He was late because hes not familiar with the area. 2. I had an amazing time. 3. The attraction is just not there for me.

Dude, whipped out pics of him and Ivanka Trump. Lots of em. That’s a huge turn off for me, I’m not impressed.

Imma see him again, tomorrow at 10am at his place for coffee. Imma tear his house apart looking for Blue’s Clues sooo, let’s pick up@this thread tomorrow