tw/ self h*rm, s*icide

over the past year I've tried to take my life 3 times and and hurt myself even more. I'm always thinking I'm worthless and that I'm a mistake. I hate my life and I hate myself more. I've been stuck in a void for the past year. I just dont have energy+

I've been depressed, I've been crying a lot. my insomnia is at full force. I've been having more panic attacks than usual. my mom doesnt believe that I'm mentally ill and one of my sisters hate me. my mom things that pills is gonna solve years of hurt and trauma but it doesnt +

my family thinks I just lazy when in reality I just have days where my depression just hits me like a train. I haven't slept in my own bed in about a month bc me and my sister who doesnt like me shares a room. Twitter is my outlet. I can be happy and myself bc at home I cant +

but I just want you guys to know I'm ok. I dont have scars bc I dont c*t, instead I just prick and poke myself with a needle. it just leaves dots and they heal faster. I've been holding this in for years bc I've been to scared of what ppl with think of me. +

I hope you guys dont see me differently. those who are reading, you are a reason I'm still here today and I love you so much. I might delete this bc I'm so scared to see how ppl will react but I want someone to know... imma post it