I've got a lot fewer spoons than I was hoping for today, even after coffee, and I'm feeling pretty down about that. Also so many people I love are sick or hurting.

So I'm gonna change my attitude and write about the things in my life I'm grateful for.

Firstly, I'm grateful for *you*. Y'all are endlessly supportive and just generally good people. I'm really glad to have this chance to get to know some of you, and just know that without you life would be a lot colder and emptier than it is.

So thank you.

Secondly, I'm grateful that I've got a place to stay and work while I wait for things to resolve. It's incredibly tough on my pride, but that's a gift! If I can use this time to learn to love and value myself when I'm in need, I'll be able to continue to see the value of others.

Right now I'm relying on the kindness of a brother that's ten years younger and I can't help but feel like this is all so backwards and like I've failed so desperately at every expectation life put out for me. So my pride is just doing flips right now, lol. I'm grateful for that.

Thirdly, I'm grateful that even though I was never any kind of especially talented person, that I spent a lot of time in the past working hard to develop skills that fool people into thinking I am.

Fourthly, I'm grateful to be past the first few years of transition. Every day gets a little bit better as things develop and GOD am I grateful for every minute bit of progress!

Fifthly, I'm grateful for having as many spoons as I do. My usual bad days now are only about as bad as my best days before HRT. The longest I've been bedridden for the last three years is a couple of days at most. It's amazing progress, and I refuse to ever take it for granted.

Sixth, as tough as life can be and as scary as the future seems right now, I'm grateful to be alive. I want to be a part of this, to live through this time. It might be dark, but dark times are the ones where we have the most opportunity to really show our light!

Seventh, I'm grateful that this thread worked and I feel much better haha