My husband is an intelligent man, let me start by saying that. Not only is he intelligent, he is a good man too.
We've been together for more than two decades, he knows me well and he was aware that he was marrying a rad fem. What I mean by that is that I never hid my views

on feminism. True, lately I've been more vocal about it, since I discovered TIMs and their fetishes. They want to erase us by claiming all our spaces. In sports, rape centres, jails... But you all know that.
My (intelligent and good) husband once asked, what's the harm,

if they feel like women. Thanks to you, good women in Twitter, I was prepared, so I asked him what he means by saying "feeling like a woman". He had no answer.
I thought I would start to send him some articles about TIMs abusing the system, not a lot, because I know him

and didn't want to push it. Every now and then, I'd send him something that got my eye thinking, he cannot fail to see how fucked up the situation is for us.
I was met with weariness, boredom even.
One Friday night, after witnessing the pile on @jk_rowling (happy birthday Jo!)

thread @TheIckabog where TIMs were posting dick pictures in response to children's drawings, I broke down and sent him a very long list of threads about it.
I asked him what he thought about it and said, "that's wrong". Forgive me for hoping for a more, I don't know, forceful

angrier, even livelier reply.
Anyway, the next day we were invited to dinner to a couple of old friends, his best friend and his wife, who I love dearly. They have a 8 year old and I wanted to tell them to join twitter just so they could read the Ickabog to their kid.

As soon as I said J K Rowling, my (intelligent and good) husband pulls a face and says, oh here we go, thinking I was going to get into the TIM debate. That shut me down completely, I didn't have a come back to that. It was the disdain he said it with that I couldn't understand.

He realised and thinking he was going to make it better, he started to explain to our friends that I was up in arms because I feel that men are taking our rights away from us. And proceeded to explain what I thought about the matter. At this point I was totally silent, just

thinking, well, at least it seems that he read what I sent him yesterday. He ended his speech by telling us what women had to do to avoid being put in that situation and please, wife, notallmen.
The room went silent. I couldn't look up from my plate. Somehow I managed to say

are you telling women how to do feminism? Has it ever occurred to you that we are where we are because good and intelligent men DON'T LISTEN TO US? Because you think we exagerate, you call us paranoid or crazy?
He (the most benign man I know) bang the table and shouted, notallmen

I kid you not. It appears that all my efforts to bring him up to speed to what was going on with women't rights worldwide he felt was an attack on him. On him and his fellow men. Defending our rights is attacking men?
I didn't say another word. We never spoke about it until

he must have felt that my silence on the matter was criticism towards him and decided to read on it.
One day he came to me and asked,
do you know Blair White.
Yes.
She seems to agree with you.
That's no she.

So I guess he needs the problem explained by a man to believe it has some merit.

This is a very roundabout way of saying that if good men like my husband react to this situation like he did, what hope do we have?

I'd like to hear other stories, I'm sure I'm not alone in this. How do you cope?