flyhiighxl and how their post on assuming idol sexuality did more harm than good: a thread.

!! Disclaimer !!
This is by no means is meant to spread hate and no one should attack this user. This thread is solely me expressing my thoughts on the situation as a lesbian & kpop stan. I would comment on the OG post but their Twitter is protected and comments are off on IG.

For the tl;dr on the situation. Flyhiighx1 made a post about stans assuming their idol's sexuality. It's a huge problem in the community and needs to be addressed, 100% agree. HOWEVER, I believe, they did it in an entirely not okay way.

I stumbled across the post on IG through the explore page and when I read through the slides, I did get upset and hurt by it. My biggest problem with the post was with its, I hope accidental, attack the LGBT+ community.

The slides only mentioned stans that expected their idols to be LBGT+. And while I get the problem with shipping within the community and how it can be toxic in extreme cases, the same thing can be said about assuming an idol is straight and straight shipping.

You cannot call out one community within the shipping situation when it exists in both. While LBGT+ shipping is more present in the community, it doesn't mean that the straight side doesn't exist and isn't as equally problematic.

They mentioned in the post about when idols are ousted as dating another idol of the opposite gender and how stans will hop on this hate wagon because they arent with their desired ship. Thats a problem, however, I believe those stans are a very small part of idol dating outrage.

The biggest issue with those "scandals" and the biggest outcriers in those situations are the delusional, mostly straight, stans that think they can get with that "oppa" or "noona". It's this idea that idols can't date because they're "married to their fans."

I do feel bad for the original poster and the hate they are getting. Its not easy to be bashed by people on the internet. The only reason I ended up making this thread was that I looked at their insta story; that's where I lost some sympathy for them.

I get in this moment where you're receiving a lot of hate that you want people to tell you that your opinions are valid. However, posting screenshots of your friend's stories onto your story is not a way to make yourself look better.

You posting those screenshots are proof that you surround yourself in an echo chamber of friends that won't let you know that "hey, this might be hurtful to a community that already experiences a lot of pain and invalidation."

Your words hurt the LGBT+ community because you assumed that shipping two male or female idols was harmful but didn't say the same thing about straight shipping. Both are equally harmful. If you wanted fans to maybe stop assuming sexualities…

Don't leave out one. Especially the only one that is considered "valid." People are still fighting for gay rights. Straight people have those rights.

I get it wasn't your intention to do so, but you still did it. And yes, you did apologize for it, but not everyone is going to accept that apology. What YOU need to accept is that sexuality is a wide and diverse topic within fandoms and that LGBT+ isn't the sole problem with it

Not everyone in this world is straight so it's silly to assume that all idols are. And yes, you might not have meant it to sound that way, but you did. You did and it's not surprising to see that people are upset about that.

All in all, I hope that this user is okay. I hope the hate dies down and I wish them the best. I also hope that they do take a look at posts that encourage them to see why people are upset and to learn how they can better their understanding of this topic.