ALREET PALS i have my zarusoba, i have my pocari sweat and a lil cup of nigori sake, i am READY for a MOVIE!

so stardust was what i thought the princess bride was lol, with a lady who came down on a meteor. That's all i know. I assume she's the... star B)

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other than that i have NO CLUE. i assume it's fantasy-lite? esque? sad, happy, no idea. actors in it? no idea.

as always, i am pleading with the deities for NO aliens NO dead-things-which-are-moving and NO spiders

i beg of ye, o film

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"Do the stars gaze back"

IS THIS A FUCKING ALIEN FILM

I'LL BE SO MAD

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Oh, London????? England??? okay well shit i guess this isn't fantasy then, wild

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oh wait maybe it's narnia fantasy type

go on dunstan you're faster than him YESSSS DUNSTAN IS FREE!!! Free to run... in the wood!

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oh wait shit there IS a fantasy world?!?! Dunstan I think you've bitten off more than you can chew my boy I don't think you're READY to deal with the fey!!!!

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jesus dunstan DON'T FOLLOW STRANGE WOMEN INTO THEIR BOUDOIRS AFTER A SINGLE KISS YOU FOOL

okay we got a magical village of Stormhold then

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OH MNY GOD NOW HE HAS A BABY

THE OLD DUDE WAS JUDGING HIM BUT HONESTLY, SAME

DUNSTAN! NO CONDOM??? YOU FOOL.

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THIS FILM IS ALREADY WILD

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Okay so we got Tristan who is bad at swords and flirting and Humphrey who's good at swords and flirting BUT is a dick

i don't suppose tristan and humphrey end up together but one can dream

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hey y'all, Black Lives STILL Matter! Check out some petitions, donate if you can, and support organisations!

https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/ 

Help1/- #YubiViews

what goddamn time period is this set in because let me tell you we have some CONFLICTING silhouettes in terms of fashion happening here

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DUNSTAN IS A GOOD DAD I THINK AND IT'S VERY NICE AND REFRESHING TO SEE A KIND, SUPPORTIVE, SINGLE DAD

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"I've never had champagne before... my god, this is delicious!"

excuse me what sort of WILDCARD person likes champagne from the first sip

"All the way to Ipswitch" LMAO

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i'm sorry is this film telling me the stars are watching me constantly because if so i am going to be exceeding terrified forever

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DID THIS KING JUST GIVE HIS KIDS THE NAMES "FIRST" "SECOND" ETC BUT IN LATIN LMFAO

PRIMUS WHAT THE HECK

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okay so here we have a bad dad who killed his brothers and we have some brothers who are maybe also brother killers--

DEFINITELY BROTHER KILLERS, BYE BYE SECUNDUS CANNAE BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THE WINDOW TRICK

LITERALLY

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OH SHIT WE GOT THE METEOR

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like father like son tristan will also do Buck Wild Shit because he's kind of horny

good to know horny-foolishness runs in the family

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GOT ONE WEEK TO GET THE STAR AND MARRY THE GIRL BUT WAIT

THE STAR IS ALSO

A GIRL

WHO MIGHT BECOME A STAR AGAIN??? We might have Yue situation here pals

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IF these divinations are correct??? why are you doing potentially incorrect divinations??? do a right one!!!!

also UH OH what's left of the last star???

you about to succ some star soul, sister???

SHE'S GONNA MUNCH... SHE'S GONNA CRUNCH...

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Grace has been incarcerated for the crime of not doing her homework during the pandemic. She is a child with a disability, not a criminal.
#FreeGrace
https://twitter.com/ajplus/status/1285359039803559936?s=20

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LMFAO OH MY GOD THE OLD MAN DID NOT FALL FOR THE SAME TRICK TWICE

HE HAS BEATEN THIS CHILD UP WITH NO REMORSE

TRISTAN THE WALL ISN'T EVEN THAT HIGH JUST CLIMB OVER IT AT ANOTHER BIT

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oh shit that was a good candle huh

he just BAMFed outta there lmao

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OOPS COLLISION COURSE

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me, in the vine voice: DO I LOOK LIKE--

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He's from England, love. Sounds about right.

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OH MY GOD PRIMUS okay well you killed 1) your pal and 2) Tertius but Septimus is still up and ready to kick your ass for that lil stunt

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oh no SEPTIMUS poisoned the drinks i see now okay

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THE FILM THIS COULD HAVE BEEN.......

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Oh dear Ditchwater Sal (great name) you Fucked Up

we just got a whole lot of people searching for the Same Things huh

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I am into throwing rune stones for divination though i like that Very Much

also yes, okay, fine, septimus is kind of hot, jeez.

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HELL YEAH THE UNICORN FREED HER

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Are y'all aware of the atrocities happening in China right now? Please sign petitions and keep informed.

https://twitter.com/HeVeryTall/status/1283941577400872960?s=20

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VERY SPOOKY ACTUALLY

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LMFAO HE COMPLETELY MISSED LEAPING ON THE COACH

god what a fool

PRIMUS YOU ARE A GOOD MAN I HOPE YOU GET TO BE KING IF WE MUST HAVE A MONARCHY

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this man is Doing His Best

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EVIL MASSAGE TIME

OH WAIT, THE PRINCE AND ALSO TRISTAN ARE HERE

COME ON DUDE SEE THE NECKLACE IT'S RIGHT THERE

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OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

PRIMUS DOWN PRIMUS DOWN

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LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OH NOOOOOO IT BACKFIRED SOMETHING SPECTACULAR

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Captain Shakespeare?!?!?

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LIGHTNING TO CATCH??? THAT'S VERY EDGE CHRONICLES OF YOU I LOVE IT

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Yvaine you're being too nice to your captor tbh he saved your life sure BUT HE ALSO STILL WANTS TO TAKE YOU AS A GIFT FOR ANOTHER HUMAN

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HEY did you know conversion therapy is still legal in scotland? please sign this petition to help stop the practice!!!

https://twitter.com/StonewallScot/status/1285516475311304709?s=20

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this film could also be called Bernard's Bad Break tbh poor dude

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i did like how primus travelled alone (save for his dead brothers) and septimus travels with 6 others to make 7 people tho

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jesus christ okay captain shakesphere sucks a lot

is there gonna be like an assault scene here because let me tell you i did not have that on my cards

also bye tristan hope you can fly????

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