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THEORY ON WHY ANAHITA IS THE WAY SHE IS: A THREAD (1/n)
i have concluded that anahita must’ve made some kind of deal with a malevolent -albeit useless and inefficient- devious deity in exchange for ... not sure? attention perhaps? a gf? a cure for dumb bitch syndrome? it remains to be determined (2/n)
ofc like all spirit deals, there was a catch: the diety would fulfill anahita’s deepest desires BUT she would have to tweet every single one of her thoughts or else she combusts and dies (3/n)
anahita, drunk with power, spontaneously agreed to the mischievous spirit’s unusual condition. at first things seemed fine. she got her online attention, she flirted with a few girls- she even received a flitz or two! anahita thoroughly enjoyed her time on twitter. (4/n)
but soon enough, our friend began to realize that she was not free. every waking moment she would be on twitter out of fear for her own life; every conscious thought had to be either tweeted or supressed into inexistence. (5/n)
you might read anahita’s tweets and laugh at her weird fruit opinions or the fact that she wants to fuck ronald mcdonald, thinking it’s all a joke. it is not. she quite literally will die if she stops tweeting. she is suffering. (6/n)
me and my team of researchers are currently investigating ways in which we can help the poor girl. i will update this thread when we have new information. for now, the best you can do is like and retweet to spread awareness. PRAY FOR ANAHITA
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🙏" title="Folded hands" aria-label="Emoji: Folded hands"> (7/n)
