Some women love the idea of being ‘spoilt’, but can’t bring themselves to accept certain gestures in real life.

I was that woman. So I learned to replace “I’m fine / It’s okay don’t worry / I can do it / I can’t accept that / You don’t have to” with:

“YES PLEASE & THANK YOU”.

Incorporating “yes please” and “thank you” into these romantic interactions didn’t come naturally. I literally had to force it. I’d tell myself “just accept it, you want it, just say yes and thanks”. It was a robotic process at first and now it comes naturally.

I think so many women spend so long believeing women have to be totally selfless in relationships (harmful). Or some women don’t want to appear needy / materialistic...so even when they want certain things they say no. Or some women are just independent to a fault sometimes.

If people also don’t believe they are deserving of nice things (for whatever reason), they find it hard to accept nice gestures.

Talking friends or your partner out of doing nice things for you isn’t a good habit. Let people help you the way you help others.

I also understand that for some women, there’s a concern there regarding how a nice gesture might be used against them. This is where discernment comes in. Who is the person to you? How do they treat you? How grand is the gesture? Do you want them in your life?

Would I accept a grand gesture from someone I barely knew? Unlikely. Someone I disliked? Hell no. I’d question their motive - which is good to do. Would I accept a grand gesture from someone who cares for me or loves me? Most certainly.

Don’t like the idea that women must struggle through relationships? You’re doing yourself a disservice by constantly refusing gifts / support. If something can be made easier for you, why willingly make it harder? If you want something, why refuse it?

“YES PLEASE & THANK YOU”

Lastly, some people are natural givers who find JOY in giving. If someone WANTS to treat you, suprise you, or spoil you...then saying no when you want it deep down, isn’t just a disservice to you but it’s one to them. You’re taking away their opportunity to give / see you smile!