Thread: I have some THINGS to say about couples looking for threesomes on dating apps. all of this is based on my experience as a person in poly/open relationships who has friends in similar relationships. 1/4

first off, every instance of group sex I have had has happened organically, and my friends can say the same. the truth is, if people wanted to have sex with you as a couple, the opportunity would likely have already presented itself, sans dating apps. 2/4

if that opportunity isn’t happening for you as a couple, it is PROBABLY because you are not presenting a dynamic that is welcoming to new potential partners. one example of this is saying things like “trying to set up a threesome for my bf’s birthday!” 2/6 oops

the problem with this is that you are not describing healthy or even desirable group sex (wherein all parties are equally considered and everyone’s feelings are important), you are describing basically adding a sex-performing body to your preexisting relationship w ur partner. 3/

if you are not approaching group sex with the mindset of “this is a shared experience between me, my partner, and a new person” but instead, “I don’t want to change my dynamic w my partner, I just want another person to participate,” consider, why would someone want to join that?

if you really want to have group sex, but don’t want to consider modifying the existing dynamic you have with a partner, consider hiring a sex worker! bc honestly, without compensation, no one wants to enter a sexual encounter where their feelings are not being considered. 6/6