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Making a thread of dumb stuff Blake says
“Oh my god, you have the subtitles on? Now I’m gonna have to read and I can’t pay attention to the movie. Ugh”
“Oh my god, you have the subtitles on? Now I’m gonna have to read and I can’t pay attention to the movie. Ugh”
Me: *blows my nose*
Blake: *looks at me in disgust* “OH MY GOD. You couldn’t have waited until I left to do that?”
Me: “to blow my nose? Why would I wait???”
Blake: “I dunno...I hate noses.”
WHY AM I FRIENDS WITH HIM
Blake: *looks at me in disgust* “OH MY GOD. You couldn’t have waited until I left to do that?”
Me: “to blow my nose? Why would I wait???”
Blake: “I dunno...I hate noses.”
WHY AM I FRIENDS WITH HIM
“I wonder if this is good...” *places roll over the top of beer and turns it over to soak roll in beer* “hmm”
*alanis and Blake arguing over how to say “shrimp”*
Me: “hi mom can you come get me I wanna go home..”
Blake: “shut up you ARE the mom.” *goes back to arguing*
Me: “hi mom can you come get me I wanna go home..”
Blake: “shut up you ARE the mom.” *goes back to arguing*
Me: “yeah but then I’d have to shave my legs”
Blake: “you sound like a girl...”
Me: “...I am a girl??”
Blake: “dang I keep forgetting”
H8 him
Blake: “you sound like a girl...”
Me: “...I am a girl??”
Blake: “dang I keep forgetting”
H8 him
So I’m making Blake run to target with me and he literally brought his own lint roller into my car because he has a black shirt on.
“Did you bring that with you?!?!”
“Yeah? Gotta look good for the ladies and it also doubles as a microphone. You don’t bring one everywhere?”
...
“Did you bring that with you?!?!”
“Yeah? Gotta look good for the ladies and it also doubles as a microphone. You don’t bring one everywhere?”
...
Blake’s driving in the rain in Houston and all of a sudden he pulls out some hair product and starts spraying it in his hair. If I die, know that I died annoyed in this moment
*blake on bumble* “why does this girl stand like an asparagus....”
Blake just said, “well I hope you’d be smarter than that for having two heads” AND PROCEEDED TO POINT TO THE PIMPLE ON MY FACE. Somebody say a prayer for him bc I’m about to kill him
