Every time one of us says, in some way:

"IT IS HARD to be a woman/POC/LGBT+ person in board games"

There are people who say, in some way:

"THAT CAN'T BE TRUE, I have never seen a gamer/publisher actually be sexist/racist/homophobic."

Let's break this down. (Thread)

First, just because you didn't see it doesn't mean it didn't happen. When your friends tell you things that happened to them, you're not like, "I don't believe a lady was swimming naked in your neighbor's pool." You're amazed along with them, right?

2/ https://twitter.com/FloridaMan__/status/1283856816632258560

Overt, intentional acts of sexism, racism, & homophobia DO happen in gaming. Things that are so obviously bad you might find the courage to call them out if you witnessed them.

Not everyone has seen something like this. If you ask around, though, you'll hear some doozies.

3/

For some people, this kind of really ugly statement/act is where their definition of sexism/racism/homophobia stops.

But friends, the truly egregious stuff isn't even what I'm thinking of when I say IT IS HARD.

4/

Likewise, when I point out the OVERWHELMING white male majority in boardgame design, there's always someone who thinks I am saying "Publishers are turning down women and POC out of outright discrimination."

Do pubs do this? Maybe. But it's not my assumption.

5/

Probably (?) there is not a ton of explicit, conscious bias among of publishers, the same way there are not horribly ugly, racist things being said every week at most game nights.

So what do I mean when I say IT IS HARD?

6/

1. GAME NIGHT

Who is your mental pic of a "typical boardgamer"?

We are diversifying, but if you've been to a lot of public gaming events that are NOT mostly straight cis white guys with lots of disposable $, you're an outlier. I mean, look at this picture of Gen Con.

7/

What happens when someone walks into a board game event and they don't fit people's image of a "typical boardgamer"?

It becomes clear that people assume:
- we're in the wrong place
- we're only there with a date, or looking for one
- we don't know anything about games

8/

People stare at us, or ignore us, because they don't know what to do with us.

People hit on us, or ask what games our boyfriends like.

Trans folks get misgendered. LGBQ folks get assumptions that we're straight.

None of that may be intentional, but it all has an impact.

9/

In these "cluelessly unwelcoming" spaces, some of us are unable to escape the feeling that there is a chance that "egregiously unacceptable" just hasn't come out yet.

In most other situations, it's really weird when there are NO women. So my brain wonders what's coming.

9/

Can't you just push through? People mean well!

Usually. But it can be exhausting.

Remember a lot of marginalized people have to push through in a similar way all day at work. And then you want them to push through for their fun.

That's not fun.

10/

2. GAMES.

Just like a game group that isn't explicitly mean but falls far short of welcoming, board games themselves can create the same feelings.

In the top 100 games on BGG as of 2018, cover art was 46% white males, 20% animals or aliens, then everybody else.

12/

If there are women or POC included at all in a game, how often are they portrayed with respect and agency?

If there are romantic relationships in a game, how often are they NOT m-f?

In the rules, how often are all players referred to as "he"?

13/

For a lot of us, this lack of representation becomes another thing that says, "oh! we didn't expect you to be here."

Each game's shortfalls might be tiny and understandable, but it adds up to a big, exhausting, pattern.

And so we push through.

14/

3. ROLE MODELS

If every game event you go to & game you play subtly makes you feel like you don't belong, it can make a HUGE difference to have people in the world that you can look up to, who do make you feel like you belong.

15/

For many marginalized groups, role models do exist in boardgames. Not a ton, but maybe more than we think. Which is why I make lists.

But no one who can name designers or reviewers would struggle to come up with the name of a white guy. It's a different order of magnitude.

16/

For every commenter on posts like this who's like, "I don't see the gender/race of boardgame designers," I've probably heard from 10 women or parents who want to tell me how important Wingspan is to them, just for the names on the front of the box.

It matters.

17/

4. LIFE

Something less talked about is how the rest of life intrudes to make becoming a gamer or a game designer easier for some people than others.

White men, on average, have more leisure time, wealth, and income than other demographic groups, in the US.

18/

Every day, the average US woman spends over an hour more than men on household chores and caregiving, and 40 min less on leisure activities.

I know so many guys who leave mom with the kids while they go to game night.

19/

On average, white households have vastly higher incomes ($71K) than Black ($42K) and Hispanic families ($51K) and 8-10x more overall wealth.

And in every racial group, women earn less than men.

That's a lot of games. In designer terms, a lot of pitching trips to cons.

20/

BUT! Some white male gamers are poor! Some don't dump their kids on their partners to game!

Yes. It's hard for them to get to conventions too. That doesn't make the statistics go away. Maybe it helps them understand the implications of the statistics that much better.

21/

BUT! Gaming is so awesome! Why are you so negative?

I believe things get better when you confront problems instead of sweeping them under the rug.

22/

IN CONCLUSION:

* I want gaming to be awesome for everyone.

* I want more interesting games designed by people from diverse backgrounds.

* I want the industry to grow massively.

And I believe those 3 things are inextricably linked.