Ok. Since I guess we’re going to keep rolling with the wide-eyed “Why would they force schools to re-open? Do they want people to die?” incredulity let’s break this down. 1/16

First thing you gotta understand that Trump, personally, does not have any beliefs. Trump is a homunculus who only superficially exhibits behavior consistent with a sentient being. He’s a fucking P-Zombie. 2/16

To the extent that any action that this administration takes isn’t directly aimed at twiddling Trump’s limbic system you have to look at which grifter (or group thereof) is pushing the policy and how they benefit. 3/16

Which means you gotta look at Betsy DeVos. Now Betsy is a typical Trumpian grifter, but all you really need to know in this context is that our current Secretary of Education hates her some public education, and loves her some private school vouchers 4/16

So, let's say Bets gets her way and schools are forced to re-open in the Fall. What are the immediate consequences (other than a mass of super-spreader infections)? 5/16

Well, let’s start with teachers' unions. Over the last few years teachers' unions and the Red for Ed movement has made decent (but hardly sufficient) gains in teacher pay. What happens to that pay in a COVID-infused reopening scenario? 6/16

Well there certainly isn’t going to be budget forthcoming to pay for the gallons of Lysol we’re going to need. So you can bet your sweet bippy that every single school system is going to go to the teachers and demand that the money come out of their salaries. 7/16

I mean come on, Hazel, do *you* want the kids to die? 8/16

And WTF are the unions going to do about it? The second they bitch every GOP hack will be flooding the airwaves with BS about how those “greedy” teachers care more about their filthy lucre than their students. 9/16

And what about the social distancing. Classrooms are already over-crowded. Who’s going to take up the slack when every desk needs to be in an 144 square foot exclusion zone? Under-trained scabs, that’s who. 10/16

But this is just the setup. The amuse bouche of shit, if you will. Because Bets has already played her hand. And that hand is called private school vouchers. 11/16

See, once parents are sufficiently horrified by the charnel house that used to be PS 104, in sweeps Bets with private school vouchers. 12/16

“Gosh Mr. & Mrs. Parent, you’re right. The gubbmint just can’t protect your kiddies. So take this tax money and use it to enroll little Bobbie Sue into Fast Eddie’s Quality School for Children.” 13/16

"Of course the voucher won’t cover the full tuition cost. I mean, Fast Eddie and his shareholders need to make a profit! You’re not *socialists* are you‽ And really, what’s an extra $100k a year to keep Bobbie Sue from drowning in her own lung juice?” 14/16

And that’s the play folks. Do they want kids to die? Nah, not really. Not if they can convert them to yet another profit center. 15/16

Thus endeth the thread. Tip your servers and order the veal. 16/16