Thread: Hey, I’m sorry if I made some people worried last night. I’ve dealt with abuse from my dad and animosity because of my disability from other people literally my entire life. It hurts. It hurts to feel excluded or shunned. I’ve had nobody my whole life.
Cont. While my experience is by no means unique, my experience is inherently different from most due to my cerebral palsy. although, there’s a lot that my friends can probably relate to. it’s just different for me because I was dealt a bad hand.
my experience has really shaped me as a person. i strive everyday to help those I care about and strangers alike. however, what causes trouble for me is the support from my friends. it just feels weird to have people care about you when for years you’ve had nobody for years.
that’s not to say i’m not endlessly appreciative for my friends (quite the opposite) it’s an odd feeling and i don’t want to hurt people with my trauma. i also don’t wish to lose friends because of my trauma. i know what it’s like to be all alone and i don’t want that.
i always feel the need to distance myself from people because i might scare them off with my trauma. but, also, i don’t talk to them as much. see the problem? i make myself lonely either way because i’m distancing myself from friends, from people I genuinely care about.
I’m scared to talk about my experiences out of fear they will leave me. They will become fatigued. It’s an endless thing. I have trouble forming relationships with people and stick to a few people.
I’m really really trying to be open and honest. It’s hard to build trust when you’ve been traumatized, though. It sucks.
Anyways, I’m going to go to bed, but, I just want to say thank you to
@TappyPaws
@AngosturaCat
@CayennePupper
@spacedmateo
@OhHeyMonsterBoy
also,
@Rhaenspots for DMing me about my disability last night.
Thank you for everything, everybody.
I’m going to go to bed.
END OF THREAD
You can follow @drowninginfish.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: