I’ve officially been to ALL FOUR Walt Disney World parks for their reopenings this last week. It’s a different world in the parks and it is NOT time for your family vacation. The parks are reopened to get guests flowing again and more importantly get Cast Members back to work.

There’s a LOT of precautions put into effect at every park, starting with parking. They’re filling every other space so you don’t open your door into another person doing the same, they’re then filling in the remaining spaces once everyone has left their vehicles. Simple, clean

No parking trams to get up to the front which makes sense: don’t clump together on a tram to all unload at the same time to swarm temperature check and security. It’s a methodical approach to everything and we’ve only just begun.

Temperature checks are happening and it’s quick and touch-free. We saw people getting their foreheads AND back of their neck (behind the ear) checked today after walking across the hot Epcot parking lot. They’re being ultra cautious about ensuring nobody with a fever gets in

Security is a little different, and I’m not going to get into specifics because we shouldn’t be discussing the screening process anyway. Just know that Animal Kingdom has new technology that the rest of the parks should be getting. It’s great.

Beyond that, if you’re flagged your bag is checked and security has you lift everything out of your bag to avoid total contact with every little piece. A quick wand of your person and you’re good to go. Not much changed from before

Park entry is checking for a Park Pass Reservation, which already validated your identity and park admission before arrival so no biometric scan is needed. Yes, your special MagicBand will still turn a cool color on the touch point

Social distance markers are everywhere a potential line can form. I say potential because of course there’s a line for security or park entry, but there’s also potential for photopass to appear in certain areas. They’re prepared for that with stickers everywhere

Queues for attractions are routed through the standby and FastPass areas to make the standby longer with the social distance markers in place. “Back and forth” cattle herder queues aren’t utilized unless absolutely necessary.

When these queues with close contact are utilized, plexiglass is installed to ensure people standing closer than 6 feet aren’t in direct contact. Not the cleanest look in the queues, but safety is priority and they’re really interesting to see!

Every other row on every attraction, your party will be separated from others parties by a row or a vehicle (in case of say Haunted Mansion it’s every other vehicle loaded). Boats are 1 or 2 parties and that’s it. They’re being strict on NOT sitting randoms together

When you ride Test Track you get your own car, no more having a random single rider with you. No single riders anywhere actually, so don’t worry about that! Randoms won’t join your row in attractions like Pirates either. Win win!

There’s plenty of relaxation zones you can safely remove your face covering in. It’s hot as HELL outside and a face covering doesn’t exactly help, but the weather is unbearable anyway so who cares about the mask when it’s 120 real feel. I don’t want a shirt on when it’s this hot

All quick service are mobile order only. “But I only have a flip phone” THE FUTURE IS NOW, OLD MAN. Cast will assist to the best of their ability but really you should be using technology to your advantage to avoid any potential touching. Apple Pay everywhere!

Overall I’ve only encountered a few choke points with any safety issues, all of which I’ve brought-up to management that have fixed the issues near immediately. I’ve felt amazingly safe across these parks, safer than going to Walmart or Publix right now!

But the reality is this: we’re still in a pandemic and unless you take the proper safety precautions yourself we’re going to be doing this a lot longer than anyone wants to. Wear a mask, stay home if you don’t feel well, and don’t travel if you feel uncomfortable with that

If you’re at a point where you’re afraid to pull your mask to the side to sip on some Starbucks, maybe you shouldn’t be visiting Magic Kingdom. We’ve been visiting theme parks for over a month now with Universal, SeaWorld, and more being open and can talk a LOT about safety

If you end up in central Florida: our hospitality is open arms (6 feet away!) to welcome you back. If you’re choosing to wait to visit us: we get it and can’t wait to see you when you’re comfortable visiting. Our economy drags on, but that’s what happens when it’s 100% tourist

I’m going to continue to support my local parks, my local businesses, and my friends who work at these locations while ensuring I am being as safe as possible to make sure they are protected as much as I am protected. Wear a goddamned mask.

But yeah, I’ve been everywhere man I’ve been everywhere man. I’ve seen safety protocols executed PROFESSIONALLY. I’ve also seen the hell hole of Fun Spot’s maskless paradise. It’s no 33 & Melt but it’s getting there.

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