i sometimes think about that scene in that movie 300 where xerxes is talking to leonidas and threatens to erase sparta from memory and that it would be like it had never existed and i wonder if anyone involved in the production really took some time to savor that rich, rich irony

the fact that the movie exists in the state it does and was not laughed out of theaters for getting _almost everything wrong_ about Lacedaemonian culture (which, by the way, sucked complete ass both to live through and to read about) means that xerxes was completely right

Thermopylae is consistently the only event from the entirety of Greek history that people outside of Greece remember with any specificity, and they usually can't even get the name. also they usually think Sparta won at Thermopylae despite the fact that everyone was dead

I blame educational publishers for writing shit-awful world history textbooks, but also why Thermopylae? It's functionally the world's goofiest 3-day siege so Greece could get its shit together, followed by ten seconds of the Persians absolutely wrecking the remaining hoplites.

Marathon and ESPECIALLY Salamis are more important, more cinematic, they capture the imagination. And, importantly, interesting people took part, historically significant people. Miltiades was there! Themistocles! HIPPIAS WAS THERE

It's estimated that fifty THOUSAND men died at Salamis. A naval battle of that scope in the ancient world is unfathomable. The weather destroyed as many ships as the beligerents did. Parts of the open water were so choked with corpses that men could walk across to enemy boats.

Marathon and Salamis _actually mattered a hell of a lot more_ than Thermopylae. So why does Sparta get this fawning treatment? They were cruel and stupid men who beat their slaves before killing them for sport, ran military drills, and didn't talk to one another. Awesome culture.

you can tell i get worked up by the end of this thread because i start capitalizing things that should be capitalized.