CHIPS ‘N’ DIP: My First (& Last) Blind Date
*a thread*
*a thread*
Alright... just when I thought I shared all my wild dating stories... BOOM.. another one.
I saw a tweet that said “imagine being on a date and he robs someone” and then I was instantly triggered... the memories flooded into my brain ALL AT ONCE.
So.. story time. Lol.
I saw a tweet that said “imagine being on a date and he robs someone” and then I was instantly triggered... the memories flooded into my brain ALL AT ONCE.
So.. story time. Lol.
aaaand let’s set the scene
A newly 18 year old Mama Z was like .232 seconds into college when I made a friend in class that I was getting REALLY cool with.
For the sake of this thread, let’s just call her.. Mya.
Mya was raunchy, and ALWAYS pushed me outside my virgin/new-to-the-world boundaries.
For the sake of this thread, let’s just call her.. Mya.
Mya was raunchy, and ALWAYS pushed me outside my virgin/new-to-the-world boundaries.
With that being said, I was at her dorm one night... we were watching one of our shows when she got a FaceTime from her new boo.
We’ll just call him Mya’s Man.. or MM. cool?
Mya and MM were cakinggggg it up on the phone, Chile
We’ll just call him Mya’s Man.. or MM. cool?
Mya and MM were cakinggggg it up on the phone, Chile
Flirting.. talkin bout sex.... talking about what they were gonna do the next time they saw eachother.
I was a virgin and hardly dated before college so I was just... in shock by all of this shit, right?
I was a virgin and hardly dated before college so I was just... in shock by all of this shit, right?
I say that because I was deadass uncomfortable, so I started packing my shit... and I whispered to Mya like, “girl, ima head out”
But she ain’t hear me cuz she was telling MM how he needs to take her on a date before he gets the kitty.
(I Stan.)
But she ain’t hear me cuz she was telling MM how he needs to take her on a date before he gets the kitty.
(I Stan.)
I started walking to the door and I heard Mya say “ooooh yessssss we can do a double date with Z!!”
I was LITERALLY like:
I was LITERALLY like:
I turned back to her and laughed like “I ain’t got no man!!”
And I didn’t!! A bitch was single as a Pringle... no prospects... and barely went on a “date” before.
I was nervous as ALL hell.
I hear MM on the phone say
“Is she cute?”
And I didn’t!! A bitch was single as a Pringle... no prospects... and barely went on a “date” before.
I was nervous as ALL hell.
I hear MM on the phone say
“Is she cute?”
Ok.. I’m alright-looking.. but I wasn’t ALL THAT back then... but Mya said “hell yeah my girl is cute!!! Why??”
MM goes, “cuz I can bring my boy”
I immediately blurted out “is HE cute?”
Mya told MM to hold on and she muted the phone... then she turned to me:
MM goes, “cuz I can bring my boy”
I immediately blurted out “is HE cute?”
Mya told MM to hold on and she muted the phone... then she turned to me:
Mya was like
“Oh you don’t have to actually like him I just don’t wanna go alone with MM”
And being the friend I am, that was enough for me.
I did ask why she ain’t wanna go alone though.. and it was bc we were 18-19 and MM and his friend was 25-26 & weren’t enrolled there.
“Oh you don’t have to actually like him I just don’t wanna go alone with MM”
And being the friend I am, that was enough for me.
I did ask why she ain’t wanna go alone though.. and it was bc we were 18-19 and MM and his friend was 25-26 & weren’t enrolled there.
Pausing the thread to say... please, please, please ALWAYS keep someone in the loop when you’re going out with someone you barely know.
Let’s stay safe!
Ok, *unpause*
Let’s stay safe!

Ok, *unpause*
After agreeing, I went home and Mya texted me details... it was going down that weekend.
I ain’t know shit about shit except
1. We were going to Dave & Busters
2. My “date”‘s name was Nito
3. He was 25
And that’s it
That’s all I knew
I ain’t know shit about shit except
1. We were going to Dave & Busters
2. My “date”‘s name was Nito
3. He was 25
And that’s it
That’s all I knew
Let’s fast forward.
It’s the day of the double date and Mya and I agreed that we would both come back to her dorm afterward and I was gonna spend the night.
We were supposed to get picked up by Nito and MM.
Mya did my hair and makeup.
We looked cute. Lol.
It’s the day of the double date and Mya and I agreed that we would both come back to her dorm afterward and I was gonna spend the night.
We were supposed to get picked up by Nito and MM.
Mya did my hair and makeup.
We looked cute. Lol.
The designated time rolls around and I remember grabbing my coat but Mya was like “Girl they’re coming in here”
And I OOP!
She went to go let them in and I was waiting in her dorm...
And I OOP!
She went to go let them in and I was waiting in her dorm...
Less than 2 minutes later, I see her door open up and I’m just standing there .......watching these 2 guys and Mya enter the room
Mya and MM were clearly acquainted. They were all over eachother and shit..
I met eyes with Nito.
He up-downed me.. then started walking toward me.
I met eyes with Nito.
He up-downed me.. then started walking toward me.
He wasn’t a bad-looking guy.
I don’t remember much detail about him but I remember not really being “attracted to him”, you know?
I was in it for my sis... wing-woman of the year type shit.
Nito says “you cute as shit... I’m Nito”
I laughed and said “nice to meet you”
I don’t remember much detail about him but I remember not really being “attracted to him”, you know?
I was in it for my sis... wing-woman of the year type shit.
Nito says “you cute as shit... I’m Nito”
I laughed and said “nice to meet you”
At that moment, MM and Mya reappeared and MM said to Nito
“Aye bro, pull that bottle out”
In my mind I got shook because a bitch never drank alcohol before
Nito pulled a bottle of fuckin Svedka
“Aye bro, pull that bottle out”
In my mind I got shook because a bitch never drank alcohol before
Nito pulled a bottle of fuckin Svedka
And y’all.... they asked Mya and I to bless the bottle but I ain’t even know what that shit meant.
I just did what Mya did.
Mya went to grab cups.
Nito was definitelyyyyyy flirting with me too, but I didn’t like him and I was only being a wingman.
I just did what Mya did.
Mya went to grab cups.
Nito was definitelyyyyyy flirting with me too, but I didn’t like him and I was only being a wingman.

So Mya pours us all a little bit of Svedka... and the shit was gross but I did a little sip anyway. Nito didn’t.
Mya and MM went into her bedroom again and I was just outside with Nito.
We were having casual conversation...Just enough, but I was ready to get a move on lmaooo
Mya and MM went into her bedroom again and I was just outside with Nito.
We were having casual conversation...Just enough, but I was ready to get a move on lmaooo
I knocked on Mya’s door like “aye y’all let’s go” 


So Mya and MM came out again and Nito announced that he was driving.
We put our coats on and headed to the door.
I deadass remember thinking “just get this shit over with”



So Mya and MM came out again and Nito announced that he was driving.
We put our coats on and headed to the door.
I deadass remember thinking “just get this shit over with”
It’s not much to say about Dave & Buster’s... Mya and MM did their lovey-Dovey couple shit & I was with Nito... getting my ass whooped in everything 
It was fun and he was cool and all, but y’all know where my head was at.
The only difference was that I was more comfortable.

It was fun and he was cool and all, but y’all know where my head was at.
The only difference was that I was more comfortable.
We spent a lot of money playing games and even ordered their overpriced, mediocre food to eat lol
And then we were getting ready to leave. Like I said, Mya and I planned for me to spend the night and we BOTH go back to her dorm.
Right?
And then we were getting ready to leave. Like I said, Mya and I planned for me to spend the night and we BOTH go back to her dorm.
Right?
But Mya decided she wanted to go to MM’s place instead.
So I took her to the side and made sure she actually wanted to and sorted out the details.. asked her to lmk she was safe and shit...
Nito chimed in like “I can take you back to campus, Z”
So I took her to the side and made sure she actually wanted to and sorted out the details.. asked her to lmk she was safe and shit...
Nito chimed in like “I can take you back to campus, Z”
We all agree and Nito dropped off MM and Mya and his crib.
then Nito & I were headed back to campus.
“You smoke?” He asked me.
I didn’t smoke A LOT so I told him no but I didn’t mind if he did. Lol.
So he pulled into a random ass parking lot.
then Nito & I were headed back to campus.
“You smoke?” He asked me.
I didn’t smoke A LOT so I told him no but I didn’t mind if he did. Lol.
So he pulled into a random ass parking lot.
Surprisingly... as he smoked, I was on the aux... and we had REALLY good conversation.
So good, that I ended up finishing the blunt with him.
And what happens when you smoke? You get hungry.
“I’m hungry as hell” I said
“Me too” Nito said
So good, that I ended up finishing the blunt with him.
And what happens when you smoke? You get hungry.
“I’m hungry as hell” I said
“Me too” Nito said
So We air out the car and start driving again and at this point it’s like 11-12 at night. (Mya was safe&good btw)
We’re like 2 seconds away from passing this random liquor store before Nito hit this SHARP ASS TURN into the lot!!
I’m like “what you doin bro lol”
We’re like 2 seconds away from passing this random liquor store before Nito hit this SHARP ASS TURN into the lot!!
I’m like “what you doin bro lol”

He parked right on the edge of the lot & was just sitting there, right?
& I was so nervous bc what the fuck was going on..??
This mf pulls a empty gym bag out the backseat, then put his hoodie’s hood on, tightened the string, and tied it.
“I’m bout to get us some snacks”
& I was so nervous bc what the fuck was going on..??
This mf pulls a empty gym bag out the backseat, then put his hoodie’s hood on, tightened the string, and tied it.
“I’m bout to get us some snacks”
I’m like “...... ok... haha....”
He turns to me like “what you want?”
I’m high, right? I’m like “everythinggggg LOLOL”
This mf starts reaching around under his seat and pulled sumn out and slid it into his hoodie pocket.
It was dark but I am Like 98% sure it was a gun.
He turns to me like “what you want?”
I’m high, right? I’m like “everythinggggg LOLOL”
This mf starts reaching around under his seat and pulled sumn out and slid it into his hoodie pocket.
It was dark but I am Like 98% sure it was a gun.
Nito gets out the car... hands in his pocket.. empty gym bag hanging on his shoulder... he was looking around everywhere as he approached the door...
We were the only car outside.
I was literally just looking and watching because i was weirded out.
We were the only car outside.
I was literally just looking and watching because i was weirded out.
I ain’t dumb, though...
I had... an INTUITION... but I chalked it up to the weed and just general disbelief that there was a purpose in this.
I looked to the left and noticed the car was still running... keys still in the ignition...
Every second felt like an hour bro
I had... an INTUITION... but I chalked it up to the weed and just general disbelief that there was a purpose in this.
I looked to the left and noticed the car was still running... keys still in the ignition...
Every second felt like an hour bro

My anxiety was thru the fucking roof so I told myself I was gonna go in..
So I opened my door and stood up outside and I heard inaudible YELLING.... coming from INSIDE the liquor store!!
Bitch, I got back in that damn car
So I opened my door and stood up outside and I heard inaudible YELLING.... coming from INSIDE the liquor store!!
Bitch, I got back in that damn car

As SOOOOON as I closed the door, Nito comes SPRAWLING out the liquor store, holding the gym bag... it was clearly full!
He deadass THREW the gym bag ON ME and hopped in the car.
I looked up and (I’m guessing) the owner came rushing out, too, holding a bat, running at the car!!
He deadass THREW the gym bag ON ME and hopped in the car.
I looked up and (I’m guessing) the owner came rushing out, too, holding a bat, running at the car!!
Nito pulled the FUCK off... gave a bitch whiplash.
The owner was behind us and I heard him yelling and shit
I’m just in the passenger seat holding the gym bag... silent.. and shook
Nito was driving fast as fuck down the road.
The owner was behind us and I heard him yelling and shit
I’m just in the passenger seat holding the gym bag... silent.. and shook
Nito was driving fast as fuck down the road.
When I say the car was SILENT as fuck the rest of the ride!!!!!
Because what the fuck was I gon say bro
We finally pulled up to my dorm
I’m like
“Thanks for tonight”
LMFAOOOO my mouth was dry as hell from my nerves yall
Because what the fuck was I gon say bro

We finally pulled up to my dorm
I’m like
“Thanks for tonight”
LMFAOOOO my mouth was dry as hell from my nerves yall
Then he grabbed the gym bag off of me and unzipped it
He was like “you can have whatever you want out of here”
I .. didn’t know what to do, so I looked inside... and y’all
He was like “you can have whatever you want out of here”
I .. didn’t know what to do, so I looked inside... and y’all
This fucking bag was **full** of chips..... candy... four lokos.... beer... little Debbie snacks..... and rellos......
I went ahead and grabbed some more shit... put it into my purse.
I could tell he wanted a kiss or sumn cuz he was giving me that look..
I was like “I gotta go! But goodnight tho!!”
I could tell he wanted a kiss or sumn cuz he was giving me that look..
I was like “I gotta go! But goodnight tho!!”
Nito told me goodnight and I tried my best to normally walk to my door..
I was just... in disbelief bro
As SOON as I got inside, I locked the door and ran to the window to make sure he was gone.
then I texted Mya (I didn’t get a response of course
)
I was just... in disbelief bro

As SOON as I got inside, I locked the door and ran to the window to make sure he was gone.
then I texted Mya (I didn’t get a response of course

I had the snacks sitting on the table. Mya knocked on my door the next day & I told her what happened.

this girl said I was ungrateful bc I had niggas willing to rob stores for me LMFAOOO
I let her have the snacks.
Then I told her no mo blind dates for me.


I let her have the snacks.
Then I told her no mo blind dates for me.

I never gave Nito my # and Mya and MM did NOT last at all so it was an experience that LITERALLY came and went 
I haven’t been on a “blind date” since LMAOO
—
I’ll add this thread to http://mamaztheguru.com/threadz
FIN.

I haven’t been on a “blind date” since LMAOO
—
I’ll add this thread to http://mamaztheguru.com/threadz

FIN.