It’s 35 years today since Live Aid!
To mark the occasion, I present a thread of puns for each of the artists who played at Wembley Stadium that day!
(Just like the music in the 80s, some of the puns are better than others.!)
#LiveAid #LiveAid35 #MondayMorning #MondayMotivation

I've just started the Adam Ant diet.
Don't chew ever, don't chew ever...

I've been invited to a Boomtown Rats convention.
Only problem, it's on a Monday.

David Bowie once bought Bing Crosby a pom pom for Christmas, but it wasn't just any old pom pom...

Apparently it was a proper pom pom.

People said I’d never get over my obsession with Phil Collins.

But take a look at me now...

I can’t see these new sausages that Elvis Costello is launching being any good...
Apparently though, olive salami is here to stay...

Well I paid £10 for a Dire Straits album and the download was completely blank.

Money for nothing...

Bryan Ferry was asked why he likes wobbly food he said “I’m just a jelly guy”

BREAKING NEWS!
Elton John's E-reader device has been blown away by a tropical storm

Like a Kindle in the wind.

Howard Jones, He's a great singer and a great guy but he still cannot understand how scoring works in tennis... #thinker

I’ve often dreamed about writing a great pun about Nik Kershaw and thought to myself ‘wouldn’t it be good...?’

Alison Moyet’s ex has allegedly been caught stealing from Starbucks...

He took a whole load of muffin for a hand full of nothing...

At a recent job interview I was asked if I could perform under pressure.

I said I didn't know that one but would ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ do ?

Fun Fact ! Pop star Sade’s father was a top plastic surgeon who pioneered laser hair removal techniques.
Smooth operator.

I sneaked into a Spandau Ballet concert once.

I got in through the barricades...

So I said to my mate, “Why are you putting a copy of ‘Rockin’ All Over the World’ in a jar of pickling vinegar?”

He said “I’m trying to preserve the Status Quo”

Paul Weller wants to get planning permission for some small steps to go over his garden fence. He has to apply via the stile council...

Just seen a bloke who looked like Sting in the red light district in Amsterdam...

He was getting a massage in a brothel.

Bono phoned me the other day to invite me out for dinner in London.

He said ‘I fancy chinese, where do you recommend ?’

I replied ‘Chinatown is good, it’s where the streets have chow mein...’

My youngest son wants be the lead singer in an Ultravox tribute band...

Personally, I don't think he's Midge Ure enough...

A guy I know called Paul Young was accused of allegedly shoplifting from the butchers several times in one week.

The butcher said to him ‘every time you go away, you take a piece of meat with you...’

My wife said last night she was leaving me this morning because of my obsession with Wham!

I said ‘OK, wake me up before you go go’.

I've been banned from our local petrol station for playing ‘The Who’ too loudly on my car stereo...

I won't get fueled again.