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When I think about impostor syndrome I think about the time I subbed for my friend who worked at an affluent suburban school. I worked in poor urban schools for almost ten years and was shocked by the way her students behaved. When they didn& #39;t understand something they DEMANDED
I explain everything to them until they were satisfied they understood. Some of them would come up to the board, write another iteration of a problem and be like What about THAT? They were taught their whole lives that if they didn& #39;t understand something it was CLEARLY someone
else& #39;s fault. My students had been taught it was their own fault when they didn& #39;t understand, and tbh that made it so much easier to project all my insecurities and failures on to them. I was fighting against the system that told them there was something wrong with them but I
was colluding with that system at the same time. When I failed as a teacher, I let part of myself blame my students. I know now, as someone whose field is literally "expertise," experts become expert by developing a sophisticated vocabulary for their own lack of understanding.
If you worked with someone who didn& #39;t have ready empathy for your questions or lack of understanding, they are the impostor. This is by way of saying, if you don& #39;t understand some things, lots of people have/had a responsibility to help you understand but couldn& #39;t fulfill it.
If you feel like it& #39;s your fault that you don& #39;t understand some things, someone made you feel that way and benefited from it. If you have lots of questions about your field, it might mean that& #39;s the perfect field for you. #impostorsyndrome #AcademicChatter
