it pales in comparison to what others have had to go through, but i thought i should share some of my own experiences with cal (AKA @mall_os/ @CallieGontheT/ @hyena_exe/ @VGtooltipsOOC) just so folks can be aware.

(1/14)

cal approached me after i followed him back in march. he was really into my art and characters, and early on had interest in my sona and in commissioning me. later into things, in the last week of april, he started initiating horny shit with me – he and vee were still (2/14)

dating at the time, and i thought from the way he initiated things that it was with consent from vee. turns out it wasn't. thinking i knew him better at the time, i didn’t suspect he would cheat, but i absolutely should have checked. (3/14)

we got to be decently close in may, talking about horny shit with our sonas and just chatting in general. along with my sona, he was also pretty into me from the pics i posted on my AD. i was comfortable with it given he’d been respectful of me, and generally i’m (4/14)

pretty open to doing that kind of thing with friends. it was fine for a while, but things started to get worse over time.

cal would vent to me often about things – his breakup with vee (which i was told was primarily because he was cis), how lonely he felt, how (5/14)

the people he wanted relationships with were already taken or weren’t into him because he’s cis. i offered what comfort i could, figuring he just had a lot going on, but it’s apparent now that this was part of a much bigger pattern of him guilting people for not constantly (6/14)

engaging with him. it would often be in the middle of a scene, and at times it felt partly directed at me.

early into us talking about horny shit, i made sure he knew and was okay with it that i related to it only as a platonic thing, and that i didn’t want it (7/14)

to be miscommunicated as romantic interest. he said that was fine, but he’d often push that boundary with indirect comments, sometimes in the middle of me comforting him over his other issues. sometimes he would say it (8/14)

affectionately – like that i was getting him “attached” – in ways that subtly made it very difficult to respond to. this was despite me checking on several occasions that he was still okay with us being intimate given my boundaries. (9/14)

things eventually reached a boiling point midway through last month. during a larger conversation cal got really depressed over my not wanting a relationship, pushing on my boundaries and telling me how much he liked me, eventually accusing me of leading him on (10/14)

when i wouldn’t reciprocate. from how he’d been acting at this point it was almost completely unsurprising, albeit still just as unbelieveable. after having babied the guy for so long, i finally chewed him out for it, bringing up all the times i’ve checked where he’s said (11/14)

it was fine then acted very much like it wasn’t. he apologized, immediately bringing up that he was “in a really bad headspace” when he said it, and that’s the last time we talked. (12/14)

that sums up my experiences with cal. he’s deeply hurt, manipulated, and abused my friend and several others, often blaming his behavior on mental illness while taking no steps to manage it, and heaping responsibility for his actions on the same people he targets. (13/14)

if you're in his circles, i'd highly advise exercising caution around him. thanks for reading. (14/14)