I have some family visiting this week and my aunt asked me if I had a girlfriend. I had a flash of fear as I remembered my extended family doesn’t know I’m bisexual. (continues)

I’m not ready for the whole family to know that yet, so I had to dance around the topic. During the whole conversation I had to pick my words and stories extremely carefully. I kind of forgot how stressful it is being in the closet... (continues)

I got so used to talking openly with my immediate family and friends that I forgot what it was like to be stressed out like that, fearing that someone might find out. Fearing that someone might reject for it. It’s fucking sucks.
(continues)

My extended family staying here for a week so I know that feeling will come back at least once. I just need to stay on my toes so it doesn’t take me by surprise. I spent 19 of my 21 years in the closet, I can hop back in for another 7 days .

I don’t have a good way to end this thread. No profound thought or moral lesson to this story. Just wanted to talk about some feelings that I hadn’t felt in a while.