Imposter syndrome is kinda kicking me again but I must confess....

While yes part of it was linked to my perception and skill in my art (through comparison), it was not the cause of it. Rather, it is my creativity and level of competence that has gotten me.... anxious I guess

As far I know, my brain doesn’t describe myself in barely any positive light, and focuses on the negative. It’s a battle I’ve been fighting for years, being a perfectionist and taking myself down really hard on every single mistake I make. It’s not fun.

Perhaps I’m inexperienced? I don’t know but damn does it hit very hard...

I... will be honest... if it weren’t for the fact that deep down I knew my life matters and that my family and friends do care about me and love me for who I am, I would have possibly done... drastic measures a long time ago.

Those were dark days...

I’m better now at the very least. There’s still a lot I need to work on and figure out how to tackle the issues and make up for the mistakes, even now with imposter syndrome hitting me hard and questioning my own competence.

But well... I’ll get better.

Apologies for making this thread, I guess I just need to write out my thoughts before my emotions swallow me up again