i slept with a bay leaf under my pillow the last 2 nights. lemme tell you, the difference between having the leaf in the underside of the pillow vs the top side of the pillow? MAJOR difference https://twitter.com/neonbluespirit/status/1280383268827721731

1st night i put the leaf on the underside (which was suggested). i dreamt but i couldn’t remember much of it upon waking. didn’t feel like any kind of profound dream, just that i had one when usually i don’t. i think it had to do with mundane things

2nd night i started with it in the same place. no dreams i can recall. about halfway thru the night my cat came in + stomped all over my pillow trying to wake me up. i flipped the pillow bc i hate when he puts his little litter feet where my face goes, which put the leaf on top

the last thing i remember before falling asleep was that i could smell the bay leaf oil + was like oh that’s nice + pass out. next thing i know, i’m standing in a torrential downpour w my mom, who is laughing + smiling + walking around easily + just happy, despite the rain

in waking life, my mom is dying of a progressive disease taking away her ability to move + think. she doesn’t smile anymore. she can’t walk very easily + falls a lot. y’all, i wanted to cry when i woke up. the last time i saw her act like that was almost exactly 2yrs ago, 7/11/18

i know the exact date bc it was a special occasion for my family, which has since become the marker for her decline. it was the last time any of us saw her being herself. not long after that, she was diagnosed + hasn’t been the same since

she’s visited me 2 other times in the astral realm. the 1st was right before she was diagnosed. we didn’t know yet, she just seemed off at the time. she interrupted a dream i was having by shouting to me “léna! help!” i woke up so confused. help with what? how?

the next time she visited me in a dream was about a year later. i had a dream i had a toddler son. i was changing him in my parents bedroom for some reason + he got up + ran down the hallway. i chased him + he disappeared. when i turned the corner to look for him i found my mom..

..laying naked, under my dog that died a few years ago. he was protecting her. they looked at me as i entered the room + i woke up. that dream has haunted me ever since. i still am not entirely sure what to make of it, but there’s a lot there

i woke up this morning, groggy + heavy feeling like i had been doing hard physical labor all night, which on some level, i guess i was. i’m taking the bay leaf out tonight so i can rest. i’ll put it back the night after + report back to this thread what happens then

in the meantime, consider this: if you choose to sleep with a bay leaf under your pillow, smelling the oils will boost your ability to tap in. but be warned, it is draining AS FUCKKKK if you do + you’re not prepared. probably even if you are. so be careful