modern au wangxian roommates where wwx makes edibles and offers to lwj as a joke like "you can have a brownie if you'd like hahaha" thinking lwj is pretty sugar free and would understand there's pot in it

he doesn't so he eats two and wwx finds him high as fuuuuuck

wwx gets home and at first all he sees is lwj just sitting there, so he says hi and is on his way to his bedroom

and then he hears it

lwj is giggling

that makes him do a double take, and a part of him already /knows/, but he has to make sure

"lan zhan?"

"w-" lwj tries, but he bursts out in laughter, unable to stop himself

"oh god, did you eat a brownie, lan zhan?"

wwx has to fill in the blanks because lwj has tears in his eyes as he nods in agreement

he *should* feel guilty, but he's pretty sure he told lwj about edibles before, and it's not like planned this!!!!! so he's amused (a little guilty, but amused)

mind you, lwj is hella high, but he's not out of himself or passing out like when drunk. he's still lwj.

he just feels comfortably numb all over, his mouth is a little dry and dear god, he can not for the life of him stop laughing. it's so funny. he doesn't even remember what.

wwx feels a tightness in his chest. it's too adorable. the sight of lwj laughing that openly in their living room, suddenly having no walls to hide behind... it almost ends wwx. he gets him a glass of water before he sits on the floor with him.

wwx is so, so gentle. he gives lwj water and watches the battle to drink it through the laughter. then he takes his hand to watch his pulse (as if it did anything with no knowledge of medicine but that's what people check, right?)

"lan zhan, are you ok?" he asks with a smile

lan zhan is still giggling, wiping down a few tears and going "aahh..." at the end of a particularly hard fit of laughter, but he nods

"you are high, lan zhan"

that sends lwj off again. laughing, it's too funny. wwx thinks he might die from it.

"can you understand me? are you really feeling fine? it's just funny?"

lwj nods, back to giggling

"i'm sorry lan zhan, i thought you /knew/, honestly our whole kitchen smelled like pot when i was done, i didn't mean for you to eat it"

he asks a few questions to know where they stand

lwj isn't seeing anything weird, seems pretty aware of where they are and what's happening, he feels fine

well, wwx might as well enjoy it and take care of him, right?

the thing with pot is, it doesn't cloud your judgment as much as alcohol, so he is aware of everything that is going on around him

he's just... not worried at all about things that usually made him restrained and concerned, he feels so fine

so when wwx is done with questions and decides to relax and sit by his side, the next wave of laughter has lwj... doing as he had always wanted to, burrying his face on wwx's neck

wwx can feel lwj's hot breath against his neck, his lips touching his skin as heaughs, the movements of lwj's chest up and down as it echoes with laughter

wwx lets him, completely frozen in place, overwhelmed and panicking

oh my god this really really really might end him

lwj calms down still against his neck, and he lets another "ahhh" with a sigh. wwx is very quiet, both because he doesn't want to make it worse for lwj and because he's afraid his heart won't be able to handle lwj laughing more.

(i'm never sure if i should keep going with threads so please like the tweets/reply asking for more if you do, otherwise i'll just assume the first tweet was enough, i might keep this going though)

"are you done?" wwx asks carefully, unable to keep the biggest smile from his face. lwj nods, still nuzzled against his neck.

they sit in silence for a few moments as wwx tries to figure out how to proceed. he doesn't have to, lwj has plans.

here's the thing about lwj: his mind is a constant horny grip, redeemed only by the lengths of his self control and restraint.

right there, he has no such thing. he's well aware. he's too horny to care.

consent is really the only concern in lwj's mind, because he's still himself, and he still cares about wwx.

so he doesn't do anything extreme.

he does, however, enjoys being close to wwx's neck, and with his mind fuzzy all over, he places a little peck to it, as a treat.

wwx, who was about to suggest getting lwj food, because he's soon going to be hungry... suddenly feels lwj's lips place an unmistakable kiss to his neck.

the chill in his stomach makes him feel like he just threw himself off a cliff. oh no.

wwx would very much like to see where that is going, but lwj is high.

"oh. hm. cool. cool cool cool cool cool cool." wwx repeats out loud as he gently removes his body from under lwj. "yeah, let's. uhm. are you hungry?"

lwj is about to say no, he has other ideas, but he soon discovers he has never been hungrier before.

"yes, as a matter of fact, food does sound good. you're a fucking genius."

lwj is talking. and he just cursed. what the f-

wwx leads him to the kitchen and places a bag of flaming hot cheetos in front of lwj - again, he expects that to be taken as a joke, but lwj is very, very serious about it.

he eats the entire bag as wwx watches mesmerised. the flaming hot part doesn't even stop him.

lwj is not even being close from being done, though, so he has another brilliant idea.

he should cook. with like, everything they have around. he is a GREAT cook, why wouldn't he?

he's high, not drunk, so he manages to sit wwx down and move to retrieve the biggest pan they have.

he decides 20 carrots is a reasonable amount for a meal for two, so he puts all of them on the counter.

he isn't as sharp as he should be with the knife - he's still good, so he's going really fast, but that makes wwx really nervous when lwj is that high.

"oh no. let me help you with that." he says, slowly taking the big knife away from him.

lwj gives him the biggest smile at that.

"you are so good, thank you." he says, surprisingly letting him have the knife to focus on other things.

not before placing a kiss to wwx's forehead, though.

wwx isn't in charge of the food, so they're suddenly making a ridiculous amount of a really weird combo lwj decided on, but he's good on assisting with anything that involves a knife, so they work mostly in silence.

mostly.

lwj is humming a song wwx has never heard before as they cook, but he's not focused on that.

lwj uses all and any opportunities to taste the food, to offer a spoon for wwx to taste it, to touch wwx in the smallest ways, to press little kisses here and there like it's nothing

lwj is so vocal now. he whines when he's frustrated and he hums as he presses a little kiss in thank you to wwx's cheek.

wwx feels like he has been thrown into his deepest, darkest fantasies of a domestic life with his husband lwj, except it's real and his high as fck roommate.

they are cooking such ridiculous amounts of a unnecessarily complicated recipe that it takes hours of this, and wwx figures lwj must be sobering up, surely.

until he moves to put something in the fridge and finds lwj snacking on... more brownie.

"lan zhan!!!!!!"

lan zhan is leaning against the kitchen sink as their food is simmering, almost done. he smiles as he finishes his bite of the browning.

"i know, right? that was so fast."

(not fast at all, also not what wwx meant)

"lan zhan, that has pot in it, ffs" wwx says, moving to get the brownie out of lwj's hands.

lwj is too slow to do anything about it, so he lets his hand fall to the side slowly as wwx's reaches for it...

wwx gets really close by impulse, focusing on taking the brownie from lan zhan.

lwj is also very focused, but on wwx getting closer instead.

wwx takes the brownie from lwj's fingers easily, but lwj wraps an arm around his waist, bringing him even closer.

wwx looks up in surprise as their bodies are flushed against each other. they hold each other's gaze in silence.

lwj's uses the hand that was holding the brownie to wrap his fingers around wwx's wrist and that briefly distracts him, so he's looking at their hands when lwj slowly but firmly shifts their bodies to press wwx against the sink.

wwx places his hand on lwj's chest, and he really means to stop him immediately, but he's weak and panicking too much.

lwj leans down, very clearly to kiss him, and all wwx can do to avoid something lwj will regret later is turning his face to the side.

lwj's lips meet wwx's neck again instead, and even though he's high he can see wwx is uncomfortable.

"wei ying." he says, his voice low and deep, very close to his ear "would you like me to stop?"

it not wwx's proudest moment. he's melting against lwj's body, pressed against the sink, feeling his body react in all these crazy ways.

a small sound escapes his lips in frustration, "no"

lwj immediately answers with kisses along wwx's neck, his tongue drawing a path up, his hands on wwx's waist, moving slightly against him.

"oh, no" wwx repeats, coming back to himself. he applies more force with the hand on lwj's chest this time, to which his very confused roomate responds by giving him space again, "i don't, but you shouldn't... don't do that, you're going to regret that later, lan zhan"

lwj is clearly frustrated, but he's too soft for wwx, and a second later he's distracted by the food again. he looks like he's about to ask wwx something when he suddenly moves to turn it off, then smiles back at him again. "it's ready"

his... creation, whatever it might be

wwx is happy to indulge lwj in something that doesn't involve an identity crisis, so he helps set the table and tastes the food fully expecting it to be terrible

it's not the best thing he ever had because his sister's soup exists, but it's close, and he's not even high

lwj is hyper focused on the food and they eat as wwx talks his ears off - more than usual, even, because he's nervous from all that happened, trying to over compensate

they don't even manage to eat half of what they made, but that's a problem for the morning

they put everything away before wwx decides lwj needs a shower. absolute necessity. not at all him trying to sober lwj up and buy himself time to avoid further kisses to the neck and possibly losing his mind.

lwj isn't as convinced.

"you should take a shower. maybe a cold one? yeah that seems great"

"are you going to join me?" lwj asks, very serious about it

oh mY GOOOOOOOOOOODDDDD wwx is burying his face in his hands and pretending he hasn't heard lwj ask that

"no, i won't, but you should take one" he manages

"why?"

"because"

sound logic, 10/10, would recommend

"... i will if you sleep with me tonight"

"LAN ZHANBDNDKFJDUGUDFTKRJDKGUKTRSMLGLDTKRMSHSKGIGKRJE" is exactly wwx's reaction

"sharing a bed, wei ying. to make sure i will be fine."

not at all related to lwj's high brain craving touch, your honor, my client pleads oopsie daisies