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i’m bored so come i remind you guys of my favorite ridiculous 7de Laan storylines over the years (these are all long ago so i might get some a lil wrong lmaoo) ANYWAY here goes:
one of my earliest memories of 7de laan is when emma got locked in the store room for who knows how long and there were gnomes there and then after she got rescued she was literally haunted by gnomes
felicity was in a wheelchair and then miraculously took her first steps at the end of one of her fashion shows
(i still reference this one a lot)
(i still reference this one a lot)
when gita faked her own child’s kidnapping to extort money from her lover, tim!!! tim took custody after that for years but gita just straight kidnapped the child again and hasn’t been back since
vanessa and xander’s child got kidnapped at their second wedding for revenge but then they got tired of her halfway through and gave her to the lady selling vetkoek causing her to be found YEARS later living in an informal settlement where they were called her “kleintjie”.
favorite of all time!! the hillsiders suspected that tannie schoeman’s niece and nephew killed her and put her in the freezer so zinzi went to investigate in their flat but got caught and put in the freezer, where she found they were ACTUALLY hiding perlemoen to smuggle 
https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">
there was an underground fight ring led by an evil clown. justin manipulated rickus into joining and he enjoyed it until a fighter named “die arend” killed him and they threw him in a river with crocodiles. also die arend turned out to be andre, the hillside lawyer
rickus was rescued by a cult against technology and he led them back to hillside where they took the entire suburb hostage by using.... technology. they also made rickus show his one testicle to everyone at some point bc the other one had to be removed after cancer https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">
that same cult got connie caught in an explosion so her face was damaged and it made her lose it and start calling herself “Beast” and she would only have sex with her boyfriend andre when he was “Die Arend” and she forced her gay store-clerk to do drag and catfish willem
neville faked his own death but then came back from the dead years later on the night of his ex wife’s wedding so he could steal her back and then they were happy for a short while until charmaine’s evil twin broke out of a mental hospital and shot and killed him again.
they just stopped showing everyone in hillside for like 3 weeks and instead had everything take place in prison like it was orange is the new black. mariaan, bonita, charmaine’s evil twin, alexa’s doppelgänger and emma all ended up in the same jail in the same cell block somehow
bonita thought her child died (https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">?) so she started a fire in the prison while mariaan was busy hiding in a mattress to escape. she almost burned to death https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">
for some reason i don’t reminder this one but i’m HUILING https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">(also if you guys have more to add like this just tweet and tag me and i’ll quote-tweet to add it to the thread like this) https://twitter.com/indiosyncratic/status/1280610811573161993?s=21">https://twitter.com/indiosync... https://twitter.com/indiosyncratic/status/1280610811573161993">https://twitter.com/indiosync...
mariaan poisoned lesedi’s eyedrops to gradually make her blind and it actually worked. lesedi was legit blind for a month or two. she also had an affair with a minor who worked for her and then “accidentally” pushed him down the stairs to his death
the youngsters went on a helicopter ride and then it crashed in the woods and they were stranded for a week and petro lost it for chocolate and then died
not a specific storyline but every time they had an afrikaans musiek band in the club and everyone had to pretend to be enjoying it https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">
wholesome storyline! bernard and nthabiseng fell in love but ppl were against it bc he was white and she was black. bernard’s mom tried to break them up and they almost did bc of all the pressure and racial tensions BUT they ended up running away together forever instead
this one! gita and ty still orchestrated the entire crash
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https://twitter.com/asiphenzwana_/status/1280615973372997632?s=21">https://twitter.com/asiphenzw... https://twitter.com/asiphenzwana_/status/1280615973372997632">https://twitter.com/asiphenzw...
felicity was a whole mess https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht">https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht"> https://twitter.com/indiosyncratic/status/1280615661711089672?s=21">https://twitter.com/indiosync... https://twitter.com/indiosyncratic/status/1280615661711089672">https://twitter.com/indiosync...
GUYS. PAULA AND SAN-MARIES BEEF ALSO. i vaguely remember they both walked a runway at a show in one episode and ended up fighting. one of them poured a whole bowl of punch on the other and called her a Slet https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="😭" title="Laut schreiendes Gesicht" aria-label="Emoji: Laut schreiendes Gesicht"> https://twitter.com/thatonepoes/status/1280614562274910210?s=21">https://twitter.com/thatonepo... https://twitter.com/thatonepoes/status/1280614562274910210">https://twitter.com/thatonepo...
the hostage situation in oppiekoffie! oubaas had a heart attack (i was hoping he’d died but he didn’t) and they shot and killed the waitress danielle, who was dating bernard at the time
they started pomping while stranded in the woods and couldn’t stop when they got home even though they were cousins LMAOOO and then eventually they got married
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