the lie of capitalism means the concept of productivity as a virtue is ingrained in our nature and anything less than that can feel really shitty - that's bad, and you shouldn't have to be constantly churning out work to be considered "A Real Creative"

that being said, in my experience the way to get better (if that is even your goal with something like writing fanfiction, which it really doesn't have to be! it's a hobby, it can just be fun! you don't have to care about craft if you don't want to!) is just to do it a lot

as much as you can. perfect is the enemy of good, and sometimes "good" is the enemy of finishing anything at all, but without doing it over and over again and putting time into it and letting yourself be bad you aren't going to get anywhere. you gotta walk before you can run

i read this quote by ira glass back in 2010 or 2011 and it's always stuck with me - he says it much better than i do