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The first protest I ever attended was against my own rights.
Prop 8 was a ballot proposition that added a new section to the state Constitution which provides that "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.” I was 11 years old at the time.
Prop 8 was a ballot proposition that added a new section to the state Constitution which provides that "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.” I was 11 years old at the time.
My church and family gathered together to fight for this proposition. We stood on the corner of a street holding signs that advocated for a loss of rights for LGBTQIA+ individuals.
I have a vivid memory of a person leaning out of their car and shouting “why do you hate us?"
I have a vivid memory of a person leaning out of their car and shouting “why do you hate us?"
Their cry never seemed to leave my head. I can still remember exactly what the pain in their voice sounded like.
I am lesbian. Queer. Gay. I have absolutely no attraction to men, and if I ever do get married it won’t be to a man. 11 year old me had no way of knowing what was right and wrong. I was steeped in a culture that was anti LGBTQIA+ but wore the cloak of being “pro family”.
I was taught that gay people were an attack on the family.
WE were an attack on THEIR family.
WE were an attack on THEIR family.
We were the problem. We were pushing for hateful policies while comfortably sitting on a pedestal of righteousness. Of privilege.
This self portrait series is my truth. My experience growing up queer in the LDS church. Life in the closet felt like I was suffocating. Always grasping for peace, begging for it. I was taught that sexual sin was second only to murder. Add QUEER sexual sin and I was fucked.
Realizing I was queer felt like a death sentence. I remember desperately holding on to the hope that I would meet the right guy and not have to deal with disappointing my entire community.
Coming out remains one of the hardest things I’ve done. I felt like my entire life would fall apart, and to be fair, it did. I could never have imagined who I would become after I gave up who I was. Living authentically lead me to the happiest years of my life.
Years filled with people who show up for me, love me unconditionally and push me to be the best version of myself. It lead me to a full time business doing what I love. It lead me to a community of people who show more resilience than I thought possible.
I am fiercely proud to be queer.
