tw: body image, postpartum depression

like @hellokatryna, instagram decided to remind me today of my pre-baby body. my self esteem right now is literally zero. adapting to my postpartum body is maybe 5% about size. about 50% of my hair fell out between 3-6 months postpartum.

my skin texture is completely different. my periods became painful and come every 2-3 weeks now. my hormones are still, even 18 months after birth, totally out of whack. everything about my body feels fucked up.

tbh how i feel about my body and depression (including a total inability to do my own eyebrows) has majorly contributed to not making videos anymore. like people are going to see how sad and numb i am all the time. the difference in my skin and hair.

not really sure what this thread is about, but i wish i could feel about myself again like i did in these old photos.