So there I am out on the deck, when my husband slides open the kitchen window and calls out to me

"Meliiiiiiiissa, there's a snake in the house"

And there is only one thing you can say in these circumstances, and that thing is "What?!"

And he repeats, helpfully, "There's a snake in the house"

And I'm sure that some of you reading this live in Florida or something where you put snakes out of your house all the time like they were spiders, but we live in the icy north and this is not something we've had to deal with?!?!

So yes, there was a very small, very cute, very confused garter snake in our house, who had somehow gotten on the wrong side of the sliding door & was sunning himself when my husband opened the door & startled him to slither for cover under a corner shelf.

We crouched down and stared at the snake and verified that yup, he was in our house, and gosh, he was cute, and hmm, yes, we needed to get him out before the cats found him, and um.

Little guy peeked out and flickered his tongue at us adorably.

The girls also came and were like Ooooooh, snake!!!

A quick poll revealed that my husband was the only one with any (extremely limited) experience picking up snakes, so he was appointed the official Snake Grabber, while I stood by ready to be Backup Snake Grabber I guess?

So yes, long story short, my husband valiantly grabbed the snake, who thrashed around and was like AAAAAAAHHHH HOLY SHIT OH NO AAAAAAAHHHHHH and peed on him.

We have now released the snake into the backyard, and all is well.

Sadly, it all moved too fast to get pics for you!

THE PLOT THICKENS

A goldfinch just spent a good while landing repeatedly on our windowsill in different spots, peering inside the house and clearly trying to figure out a way to get in

WHY ARE ANIMALS TRYING TO GET INSIDE OUR HOUSE

I was thinking about this and then realized I have a two girls aged 13 and 16

And I was like ALL RIGHT, which of you is a protagonist?! I think someone is trying to get a message to you

...I didn't even think to connect this until just now, but for over a week now this black cat has been coming to our back sliding door and staring in almost every night. I was pretty sure it was just to troll our orange cat (they face off through the glass), but NOW I WONDER

Next up is going to be a unicorn or some shit