I knew this day would come but it's still hard for me.

In 2018, I took a call from a woman named Linda Showeratz. She offered me 2k in bitcoin to start an Alan Dershowitz Fan Account on Twitter.

I said no. (Duh.) For one thing I didn't tweet.

Then she offered me 20k.

1/n

Now you may be asking yourself: Why’d I assume a stranger phoning me with this most bizarre & distasteful request was serious?

Why not figure, say, that my ex-boyfriend, a funny guy who does stand-up, was high with a bunch of degen comics, one of whom got put up to this?

2/n

Reason #1 is that after college I’d worked as a ghostwriter in NYC. I “helped” a man whose name you’d probably know to complete his memoir.

This btw was after the main ghost (a friend of mine from college) quit for reasons she wouldn’t explain, citing NDAs.

3/n

To be clear: the man whose memoir I helped finish (without any weirdness from him, btw) was not Dershowitz. Nor was he anyone famous for knowing Dershowitz.

But was it likely they knew each other from the dork-glam world they shared? Absolutely. Plausibly friends? Yes.

4/n

Memoir-man is important later, so keep him in mind. For now he only matters bc he had two assistants. The one who dealt with me on scheduling and payments, call her Grace, had phoned a day earlier to ask if I was still in the ghostwriting biz. A friend of memoir-man…

5/n

…was looking to hire the woman that he (so I was only hearing now) had raved about.

FWIW I doubt he saw me as rave-worthy. But I knew the compliment had been approved by him. It mattered to memoir-man, somehow, that I help his friend write.

6/n