Are you in love with a person or an idea? (a thread):

1. How do they leave you feeling most of the time? No relationship is perfect, but what is the dominant feeling they leave you with?

2. Do you find yourself rationalizing their behavior more often than not?

3. Are you afraid to ask certain questions or confront certain truths out of fear of disrupting the relationship?

4. Does the relationship require a very specific set of circumstances to feel good?

5. Do they respond within a time frame that feels good for you?

6. Are they in tune with you emotionally or do you feel the need to write a manual? There’s a difference between communicating your needs and having to write it all out.

7. Are you seeking real connection from this person or mainly validation?

8. Does their mistreatment towards you motivate you to change them or walk away? Why do you think that is?

9. Do you feel like a broken record when communicating your emotional needs? Expressing your love languages is always important - but how much do you need to go over the same points?

10. Would you encourage your future child to be in the kind of relationship you’re pursuing or in right now?

11. Are you more attracted to their potential or who they really are?