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This is Geza Pozsar, the longtime friend and choreographer for the Karolyis. One of the most famous choreographers in the gymnastics world.
I often get asked "can people make mistakes and change? What would that look like?"
Here's what we learn from Geza: (thread) https://twitter.com/GezaPozsar/status/1277820345697710080
I often get asked "can people make mistakes and change? What would that look like?"
Here's what we learn from Geza: (thread) https://twitter.com/GezaPozsar/status/1277820345697710080
When the Nassar story began to break, and elite athletes eventually came forward about the abusive culture in USAG, almost every coach denied it, and vilified the athletes speaking up.
Geza made a different choice. He chose to break with a longtime friendship, and his legacy.
Geza made a different choice. He chose to break with a longtime friendship, and his legacy.
Geza chose to tell the truth. Not general apologies that bad things happened - the actual truth. Even though it meant speaking out against people he had been close to (the Karolyis) and a system that had given him his career and legacy.
He expressed deep regret and remorse. . .
He expressed deep regret and remorse. . .
Not just remorse that bad things happened, but acknowledged his own failures to speak up louder, and the resultant complicity.
He told the truth about what was going on - hitting the girls, denying them food, the mindset of wanting total control over these athletes.
He told the truth about what was going on - hitting the girls, denying them food, the mindset of wanting total control over these athletes.
Geza felt the weight of the damage and it motivated him to become part of the solution, even though it cost. He became an advocate with the survivors, instead of putting out political statements that soft-balled the realities.
When you are asking what it looks like to begin to be trustworthy again after being part of an abusive system - it looks a lot like this:
Specific recognition of your own failures, without minimizing or deflecting or leaving out information.
Specific recognition of your own failures, without minimizing or deflecting or leaving out information.
It looks like telling the truth regardless of the cost, the relationships, the career, the legacy. Tell the truth.
That means specifics, not generalities.
That means specifics, not generalities.
It means intentionally moving to become part of the solution, to become an ally with the survivors, fighting alongside them for the truth.
Because if you truly feel the weight of the damage, you will be motivated to act.
Because if you truly feel the weight of the damage, you will be motivated to act.
Geza could have slipped away quietly and not said a word. He could have stayed out of the fray, he could have stayed in the good graces of USAG and his friends.
He chose differently.
I am grateful.
He chose differently.
I am grateful.
If you are a leader who has erred in the past, choose differently.
If you are a leader trying to determine if someone has learned from their mistakes, watch their actions. Have they actively and intentionally become part of the solution, or have they taken the quiet way out?
If you are a leader trying to determine if someone has learned from their mistakes, watch their actions. Have they actively and intentionally become part of the solution, or have they taken the quiet way out?
Love and leadership will motivate you to become part of the solution - to become an ally fighting for the truth and what is right - if you feel the weight of the errors in your past.
The narrative that survivors or advocates are impossible to please and will complain no matter what you do is false. Don't buy it.
But do listen to what real change looks like.
Few leaders make the choice Geza made. We could use a whole lot more leaders like him.
But do listen to what real change looks like.
Few leaders make the choice Geza made. We could use a whole lot more leaders like him.
