***THREAD***

I am going to keep bringing up these things until those who are guilty of having done so ACTUALLY RESPOND.

1)

Stop asking me how I'm doing. This is a walk in the park for me. You wanna know why? Remember when you were off chasing empty pursuits, running the hamster wheel?

2)

And forgot that I existed when I couldn't find a job (despite everything in my dossier superseding everything in yours even now, 8, 10 years later?) Remember when you quipped, "you chose the wrong field?" Remember when you had nothing but stares at the floor and fake prayers?

3)

Remember when you thought that I -- who have burned the candle at both ends all my life (particularly when not doing a job, because I actually knew my purpose in life EARLY and have feverishly perfected the gifts necessary to fulfill it) -- was "lazy" or "not motivated?"

4)

Remember when you thought you were making me jealous by talking about how much you traveled and went this place and spent this amount that place, when I GREW UP doing these things? As if you can impress or post high on me?

5)

DO YOU REMEMBER?

A lotta yah sounding real unfamiliar now with all your "depression" and "I can't take anymore of 2020" or "shoot me now" talk. You've been (semi) locked down for three months.

6)

I went through this for FIVE. AND. A. HALF. YEARS. with little to no encouragement, except occasionally from my parents. And that can only go so far.

7)

I sit with my feet up in my studio and have a million projects going on at once. I study ants. I also study birds. I have, all my life. I comport myself like them. It's summer now. I am storing up and preparing for the perilous times that WILL come this fall/winter.

8)

I'm not going to be caught with my pants around my ankles come January when they've released another virus and everyone's acting like they didn't hear the warnings from those of us who --

9)

while sitting for (you guessed it, five-and-a-half-years) gained wisdom that you can only attain BY being forced to sit down.

10)

I don't regret any of it, in retrospect. I'd be lost, depressed, suicidal (and I'm the antithesis of the suicidal type) and speaking all kinds of death and hopelessness like I see up and down my TL on Twitter and IG all day.

11)

The thing is, most feigned concern, and others didn't care at all, once I could no longer do for them like they had been accustomed all my adult life up until 2009.

I was where I was supposed to be at that point in time. I have perfect peace in the midst of all the chaos.

12)

Thanks to those who genuinely DO ask how I'm doing, though. Some'a yah know I will go an entire calendar year and won't call, text, come see you or have you over -- and won't miss you, either -- and then show up out of the blue unannounced. That's just how I roll.

13)

Helps keep the "negative energies" away that Sal Bompensiero was leery about with Richie Aprile.

14)

Maybe with more time sitting on your "hind parts" and being forced to look in the mirror and think about where you are in life, you'll actually develop some altruism moving forward in this life.

You won't survive without it. I promise. That's the whole point of this post.

15)

It isn't to thumb my nose at anyone because I'm doing well again. On the contrary, I LEARNED from my experiences and I have to counsel at least 4 or 5 people (with complete confidence and anonymity)

16)

about how they are feeling with the weight of all this bearing down on them spiritually and emotionally nowadays. Some of them only peripherally knew what I went through. Some don't know at all, but can tell that I am genuine when I tell them I've felt what they feel now.

17)

I was thisclose to literally grabbing the Glock and going on a Colin Ferguson killing spree because I was fed up. September 2017. This job came calling out of nowhere literally the next day. My cousin, who lived with me at the time, can attest.

18)

It saved a lot of lives and an extensive Supermax prison sentence for me. The ram was in the bush and came hurtling out just in time.

19)

BELIEVE ME when I tell you that it can be much worse than these three months have been for many people. And do not despair or give up. You cannot. There are people whose destiny is tied to you pushing through and fulfilling the purpose for which you're STILL HERE to fulfill.

20)

10-4. Out.

6.29.2020.
MDW

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