Thread by @bombsfall, so I'm talking to my friend Saleem today and he says "I [...]

so I'm talking to my friend Saleem today and he says "I was watching Netflix and I saw this thing: The American Bible challenge. Are you familiar with this?" and I was like dude, my entire youth was the American Bible Challenge

I am now watching the American Bible Challenge

you can blame @Seemo for this

thus far all i can tell is the team of evangelicals compete for money for a chosen charity, and it's hosted by Jeff Foxworthy. within the first 3 minutes, Jeff has made a "you might be redneck" joke and the contestants were delighted and clapped

This is gonna be great

jeff introduces the first category with "imagine if biblical characters had access to twitter"

These are baby questions. This is a joke of a quiz

There's a choir that is singing a pop rendition of Leaning On The Everlasting Arms. Night Of The Hunter fans will enjoy

There's an entire category about Tim Tebow and the verses he wrote under his eyes while playing football.

i have known the answer to every question thus far. i would dominate these fools

Twitter I assume you all know these verses by heart

I bet this is a difficult question for scrubs who weren't made to learn this entire chapter as a song in 4th grade

You wouldn't assume so but these guys are utterly bombing an entry level Bible quiz

I'm shouting out the answers before the contestants do. And yet I am winning nothing

it's GATH. Gath you poseurs. IT's GATH

they said Goliath was from "Gad". unbelievable

this one guy pronounced Philemon as "Fill-uh-mun"

this thread is like illegible for people who weren't raised evangelical

i appreciate all people in my replies saying "what even is that bible fact i was raised catholic"

ye papists following me knoweth not the scriptures, but the time hath not come to completion that thou art prepared for this conversation

contestant: uh.... uh.... pass

me: consider the ANT! consider the ANT THOU FUCKING SLUGGARD!!

foaming and cursing at the bible game show contestants

This current episode of American Bible Challenge features a team of christian rappers and a team of who do feats of strength for assemblies of children to teach them about the gospel and not doing drugs presumably

American Bible Challenge is a look into my life if it had taken some very different turns

current American Bible Challenge category is Song of Solomon focused. for the uninitiated, Song of Solomon (or Song of Songs) is an entire book dedicated to being just incredibly horny but in a godly manner